


Our path is crooked

by Ikajo



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Aftermath of Torture, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Canon What Canon, Complicated Relationships, Dark, Falling In Love, Hurt, Hurt Loki (Marvel), M/M, Moral Ambiguity, Mpreg, Poor Clint Barton, Poor Loki (Marvel), SHIELD, Sexual Tension, Sick Loki (Marvel), The Avengers Are Good Bros, Torture
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-30
Updated: 2019-05-08
Packaged: 2020-02-10 14:46:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 14
Words: 21,875
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18662518
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ikajo/pseuds/Ikajo
Summary: Two years after the battle in New York Thor lands outside the Avengers compound carrying his unconscious brother. Soon the Avengers discovers the horrors the god of mischief has faced and still face. Clint Barton face a problem of his own. Surely you are not meant to feel sexual attraction towards someone who ones mind-controlled you, right? Only, Loki is one sexy bastard.





	1. Be careful of the guests you invite

**Author's Note:**

> This one will be fairly dark and if anyone think I should add a tag or something similar just give me a heads up. I will pretty much ignore any canon that I see no use of and use the parts that helps my own story along. There will be some pretty dark elements but I will not make things explicit when it comes to sexual violence.

 He was old. How old he didn't know. Just old. Not age truly mattered to a man like him. Even the word man could only define him loosely. Those who knew of him normally knew enough to stay away. Therefore it surprised him when someone requested his assistance. Chuckling to himself he went as summoned to see who was foolish enough to call on him. Among the noise of the Chitauri sat the Titan Thanos on his throne. At his feet lay a young man who they clearly had put through the wringer. They wanted his help to break the man. Foolish, foolish. He touched the pale skin and green eyes fixated on him. There was a hum within this creature, something far stronger and resilient than those who sought his subjugation. He had suffered a lot recently. Lost as sense of himself. Haste was always a bore. So he didn't do a whole lot. A small seed of insanity that was enough to place the strange creature under the control of the Mind Stone. Twisting his perceptions. A pity that the vibrant green had dimmed and the power of the Stone coloured them as well. He was very displeased with Thanos. The Titan acted as if he was a servant. His whole plan was plain stupid and would never do what he wanted. As punishment he placed a curse on him. One that would be the Titan's downfall sooner rather than later. 

Returning to his corner of the universe he played with the occasional passerby. As he grew bored he decided to see if any former plaything was still around. Thanos was already dying from the curse and those around him either got killed or left. No fun. But that strange little creature he had seen, the green eyed wonder, was still alive. Freed from the Stone and his seed long gone. Grinning he rose. Asgard. Hidden beneath the rock were a toy ready for the taking.

* * *

 

What ever power this man had it was terrifying. Within seconds he had swooped in and rendered them all helpless. Bending reality around him there was nothing they could do.

"Hmm... how dreary. Ever heard of interior design? Using only a single colour. Horrible. Ah well. My pretties, go fetch my plaything would you?" Strange creatures swarmed around the man, a couple of them broke loose and disappeared. Half the size of a man they wore bird like masks and dressed entirely in black. Black eyes glanced in their direction before ignoring them again. In all his years Odin had never felt as powerless as he did at that moment. Together with Thor and Frigga he was held with invisible bindings. Unless their ability to move had simply been taken from them. The creatures reappeared, dragging someone after them. When he saw who it was the All-Father felt blood drain from his face. Loki.

"Aah my pretties. Wonderful. Bring him closer." Hearing the voice the god of mischief jerked his head up with a snarl and then froze. "Mmm. You look quite fetching. Glad to see those green orbs of your eh. I never introduced myself then did I. They call me the Curse or the Accursed. You could say I have certain... skills... but you wouldn't want to pay the price for them. Don't you worry though. We will have fun anyway."

With a burst of movement Loki got to his feet, summoned a knife from who knows where and made to charge the man. The knife clattered to the floor and the Trickster collapsed on the floor. Limbs still.

"Fascinating. How did you managed that I wonder. Turn him onto his back. I want to see this." The swarm did his bidding. The stone floor that the black-haired god lay on started rising somewhat. Only a foot or so. Odin peered at his son and saw to his relief the rise and fall of his chest. He also saw the panic in his eyes. Kneeling at the Trickster's side this Curse caressed his cheek in a mockery of tenderness. Placing a hand on his chest green strands of light was lifted. Loki gave a choking sound. More strands of green was dragged from his body. Held as a messy ball of yarn.

"Hmm... is this perhaps Seidr. I have never seen it before. So that's how you kept your sanity under Thanos tortures. Your Seidr kept your mind intact. Did he leave scars I wonder. Here my pretties, play with this." Wanting to cry Odin watched his youngest son writhe despite the limpness of his body as the creatures tore at his magic. Causing far more harm than any physical attack could have done. In the meantime this nightmare of a man started taking off the young god's clothes. Again in a manner that was mockingly tender. Leaving the prince naked on the cold stone. Settling between his legs the Curse ran his fingers along pale skin.

"Good, good. Not a blemish on this pretty body. You are quite a beauty you know. Oh, don't worry. I don't feel such urges. There are far more interesting things." Taking back the tangled magic he started playing with it. Untangling. Braiding. Undoing the braid. Tugged, pulled. Trying to break the strands. Succeeding a few times and not bother fixing it. Through out it all Loki whimpered in pain, unable to use his voice. Tears of pain and humiliation stained his face. The man had no care for the pain he caused or his invasive touches. Odin's son was completely exposed and vulnerable, at the mercy of this  _thing_.

Suddenly the Curse tugged free a strand of gold. It was thicker than the others and would not be pulled out no matter what they did. Now they were starting to get brutal. The creatures following their master's orders. Frustration began showing on the man's face. Dark, billowing clouds rolled of him and dispersed in the air. In it were wrongness. Finally the man, the thing, had enough. Roughly he shoved all the broken and tangled strands back into Loki's body. Convulsions went through the Trickster before he went completely slack.

"That was a disappointment. Come my pretties, let's find something more fun to do." Then, he was gone. The moment they were released from whatever spell had held them all three members of the royal family ran to their youngest. Thor reached him first, tearing his cloak from his back and used it to cover his brother. Frigga was crying as she lifted her son into her arms. Placing a hand on Loki's forehead Odin could sense a fever. His boy didn't notice anything, no longer conscious. The mess that had been made of his magic was a threat to his health.

With a slam the great doors was thrown open and a prison guard stormed in, shouting loudly. "My king! The prisoner Loki has escaped his cell. We don't know how he..." tapering of the guard realised that they were gathered around the presumed escapee who looked close to death.

"My son is free from all charges", Odin said in a heavy voice. "Please inform Eir we need her."

Little did they know that things were about to get worse. Much much worse.


	2. Rolling the dice

It was a fifth patient for the day and more was waiting. Coughing, stomach pains and fainting spells. She could determine the cause but not the cure. A cloud of miasma had rolled over the Realm Eternal, causing sickness in its wake. Rubbing her back Eir cursed who ever caused this. A prison guard burst into the infirmary, looking slightly winded. Since he didn't show signs of sickness she guessed the dungeons had also been affected. It had to be bad for the guards to even bother.

"Lady Eir, the king is requesting your presence", he panted out. "It's the prisoner Loki."

Wonderful. The poor boy, what had Odin been thinking. "Where is he?"

"The throne room, Lady Eir", the guard said. Sighing the healer sent him back to his duty, making a mental note to check on the prisoners. It didn't take her long to reach the gaudy hall but then she froze. Miasma was clawing at the walls, rolling through any crack or opening. It was thick. So thick that she didn't see the royal family at first. They were all kneeling on the floor, holding on to the second prince. Loki was horribly pale and from the looks of things he had been stripped naked only for them to cover him with their capes. Already she could see them becoming affected by the cloud of sickness. Shaking herself she hurried forward but no sooner had she placed her hands on the boy before she recoiled in horror.

"What happened?" she demanded, forcing herself to assess her patient. Odin gave her a very clinical but thorough explaination. It sent a chill through her bones. They had all sensed that something was wrong. That time didn't move as it was supposed to and the heavy miasma. And under her hands she could tell just how damaged Loki was.

"He can't stay here", Eir stated.

"I can have his chambers cleaned and prepared", the queen said, crying softly. 

"That won't be enough. He can't stay on Asgard."

"You would want to send my brother away in this state!" Thor glared at her but she wasn't intimidated. 

"Your Highness, at this very moment sickness is spreading through the Realm. Likely caused by this Curse. I can see the miasma all around us. Prince Loki is to weakened. Both from his imprisonment and then from the torture in this very room. If he remains in Asgard, he will die before the end of the day. Already I can feel him slip away."

"Then I will take my brother somewhere where he will be safe."

"No. And stop glaring at me. You too have been afflicted by the miasma. Not only would you endanger your brother but also everyone else. Wherever you take him, you can't stay for longer than a few minutes."

"Thor, bring your brother to Midgard", Odin said. "To those mortals you joined forces with before."

"But Father..."

"I will make certain they can't harm him. Midgard has the least amount of background magic in the Nine. He will heal easier there. At least I hope so."

"There is no time, my prince. Once your father has placed the protection charm you need to go or else your brother will die."

* * *

 

They were all sitting and enjoying the autumn sun spilling in from the large glass panels. Making an atrium had been an excellent idea. No winds to bother them, heating mechanisms provided comfort. And thankfully they could withstand a lot if force. As the pillar of multi-coloured lights slammed into the ground the panels protested loudly but didn't break. Knowing this to be the Bifrost they all stood to greet their long absent friend. Tony waved to open the doors out to the garden and couldn't believe his eyes. It was Thor alright. Only, in his arms he carried none other than Loki. The Trickster was hanging limply in his brother's arms. Unconscious. 

"My friends", the Thunderer greeted. Walked forward and unceremoniously dumped the limp form in Tony's arms. Staggering under the sudden weight the engineer had barely time to register the action before the god of thunder had beamed up again. Finally defeated by the unexpected burden he fell backwards together with their sudden guest. All the others rushed to his aid.

"Geez, you would think they could at least dress the bastard", Clint muttered. As he was helped up by Steve Tony could see that Loki was indeed very, very naked. For some reason they had just wrapped him in some blankets or something. Wait, wasn't that Thor's cape? Bruce being Bruce he began looking over the unconscious god, trying to understand what was going on.

"He looks thin", Romanoff remarked. "Malnourished?"

"Probably", the Doctor said. "His pulse is rather weak. Why would Thor bring him here and not explain?"

"Good question", Steve lifted the god in his arms, allowing the billionaire to regain his feet. "An even better question is, what do we do with him?"

"Guess we can't just kill him", the archer grumbled. "That would be the same as written our own obituaries."

"Let's place him in the medical holding cell", Bruce suggested. "That way we can monitor his health while also making certain he can't cause any damage. We might be able to get some answers when he wakes up."

"Let's take turns watching him", Romanoff said. "Just in case."

* * *

 

The bastard was still naked under the white sheets. They didn't have any clothes that could fit him properly and no one really wanted to try to dress him anyway. A few tests had shown that Loki's vitals had been dangerously low when he arrived but they were steadily growing more stable. Yippie... Clint crossed his arms and tried to ignore the memories crowding his mind. Two years since the Battle of New York and here he was, keeping watch over the culprit. Waiting for him to open those blue green eyes that haunted his dreams. A groan came from the bed. Twitching and ever so slowly the bastard opened his eyes. He lay still, gaze flickering. Gauging the room. Then he saw Clint. 

"Barton?" he muttered. "Have I gone crazy then..." Another groan and some coughing. Blinking Loki seemed to regain full consciousness. "Or not... this is no Asgard I think."

"This is the Avengers compound your ass", the archer said. "Thor dumped you here without a word." Green orbs fell on him. There were no fear in those eyes. Just calm acceptance. 

"He is well, at least. That man didn't harm him. Good."

"What man?"

"One you should pray never meeting, Barton. The way he bend reality is frightening. There is little he won't do."

"Uhu, and why are you naked? That sure as heck wasn't us." Instead of answering the bastard swallowed heavily and squeezed his eyes close.

"Barton, if your intentions is to kill me please just do so. Do not torment me. I have expected to die several times over the last few years. At my own hands or others. But no more torture."

Feeling sick Clint stood hastily and almost ran out of the room. The silent resignation, the small tells speaking of pain. Torture. He had suspected. From the very beginning he had suspected and chosen to ignore it in favour of hating the crazy god bent on world domination. He didn't think the Trickster was lying. What had he to gain from doing so? Nothing. 

He burst out of the door to the common room and tried to breathe. Of course the others were there. Staring at him.

"You okay there, Clint?" Stark asked.

"Loki... he's awake. You wanted to talk to him." The engineer nodded in understanding. 

"Sorry about that. Come on Brucie bear, Stevie. Let's go talk to tall, dark and crazy."

* * *

 

Who turned out to be quite amenable. Loki had requested some water when asked if he needed anything and had answered their questions without acting like a jerk or holding things back for fun. He had been tired, at times seemingly on the verge of drifting off. Solitary confinement, wilful neglect from the guards and irregular schedule could do that to a person. It was him speaking of the other stuff that made them feel sick. Yet he didn't blame them for their actions during the invasion.

"I was a madman threatening your world. You did what you had to", he said. 

"How are you feeling right now?" Bruce asked him gently.

"Feverish."

"That's odd, your temperature is 36.5°C. If anything you should feel cold..."

"I'm Frost Giant good doctor. They live on a Realm made of ice. I suspect my temperature in your terms are rather low."

"You are tall but not a giant", Steve argued. A smile twitched on the Trickster's lips.

"The Dwarves of Nidavallir are giants compared to humans but are still dwarves", he chuckled softly. "I'm a runt. My blood father abandoned me as a baby and Odin took me in as his own. Thor did not tell you?"

"He only said you are adopted", the Doctor said. "So you are not the same spieces?"

"No... although neither of us knew this growing up. Indeed, neither knew we were not related by blood."

Well, that's pretty shitty. You really shouldn't keep stuff like that a secret. Then the ever practical, Steve addressed a more urgent issue.

"I understand your circumstances but you still caused a lot of damage and death. Would you be willing to work with us, the Avengers, as a way of making amends?" Captain spangles said.

Loki pondered it for a couple of minutes and then agreed. "If you are willing, then I think there will be no harm. I will help best I can."

"That's all we are asking."


	3. We all are strangers

The Trickster had graciously been granted a room by Stark and was allowed to leave the holding cell. Since he still didn't have any clothes he had been given a robe to wrap himself in. His whole demeanour was different from before. More collected. Calm. Natasha had not lived this long however by being careless. Which was why she leaned on the door frame to watch him. Loki had been handed a tablet and was browsing an online store for clothing. He had admitted to being able to conjure clothing but Bruce had put his foot down. Since the god was still recovering and Tony had more than enough money, buying him clothes was not a big deal. Interestingly enough the god of mischief seemed fully immersed in the selection of clothes he could choose from. Then he looked up at her.

"Agent Romanoff, is there something I can do for you?" he asked in a pleasant voice. 

"I don't trust you."

"You are not the first and will likely not be the last to have such sentiments. Still, I was told that this whole building has means of surveillance. Surely you don't need to stand watch? I was hoping to take a bath once I've finished my wardrobe and I really don't fancy undressing in front of you."

"I've already seen your junk", Natasha retorted. "Nothing special about it." Loki closed his eyes, an odd expression flickering. 

"Agent Romanoff... I was undressed against my will after having been rendered immobile by a creature able to bend reality. He tore and my magic without any concern for the consequences. Touching me without care. At the moment, I rather not be undressed in front of anyone. Even if they have seen me before."

She was quiet. Careful not to reveal any facial expressions. Studying their former villain. "Did he rape you?"

"No... or rather, not physically. What he did was in a way worse. My magic is a part of me, agent Romanoff, in the same way my blood or bones are. Removing it for any reason could kill me. However, even attempting is exceedingly difficult. And this man tore at my magic as if it was no more difficult than tearing at a ball of yarn. So, please allow me my privacy. At least openly."

"Why reveal this to me? I didn't picture you as someone who would show vulnerability to an enemy", she glared at him, her arms crossed to make the point. "Unless you are lying."

"You can't see a reason for me to show weakness even though my safety here is dependent on the aid you and your friends can provide for me? And here I thought you were cleverer than that." He resumed his browsing of clothes. "Also, just because I'm known as the god of lies doesn't mean that everything I say is a lie. In fact, it is those who don't want to hear the truth that accuse me of lying. So who's the liar then?" Loki didn't look at her again and finally she left.

* * *

 

Damn this guy! Why? With clothes delivered and after a long bath the god of mischief looked far better than before. But really? Skinny jeans and a cotton long-sleeved shirt? Clint hated labels when it came to attraction and was usually drawn to those who would challenge status quo. That was fine. This wasn't. Loki was seriously attractive when he was acting civil and didn't try to kill you. Already he was Tony's new favourite person and Bruce wasn't far behind. Not only did the god happily talk about magic, he had knowledge about a shit ton of things. Most of it sciency. The science geeks geeked even more than usual. Steve as usual answered in kind as he received. Since the Trickster went out of his way to be polite and avoid conflict, he did the same. Still careful. Dude wasn't stupid. But willing to give the benefit of the doubt. 

"Okay. Just tell me something. What's with the whole general joe super model version you got going on!" Tony said. "You could have ordered just about anything."

"I'm not so uncouth as to abuse your generosity, Stark. You didn't have to give me anything. You have absolutely no obligation towards me." The god gave him a charming smile. "Besides, dressing well is about sense. Not money."

"Are you sure you are a prince?" The engineer lifted an eyebrow while smiling. He got a chuckle in return. 

"I've travelled to many places. Unlike Thor I preferred to do so without drawing attention to myself. He used to relish in his title, flaunting it everywhere. You wouldn't believe the troubles he got himself into."

"Now you've made me curious. Go on and tell me Shakespeare. What?" Again Loki was chuckling at Tony.

"No, I just find it amusing that you are calling me Shakespeare. I and William used to be good friends back in the day. We both loved the power of words and spinning stories."

Clint dropped his phone. He had trying hard to distract himself from his very improper thoughts. "You knew William Shakespeare?"

"I've lived for over a thousand years, Barton. I used to visit Midgard often until my father found out. You mortals have a lot of ingenuity, it's mesmerising."

"What happened to us being ants?" The archer stuck out his chin and the little shit actually seemed regretful. 

"My... mind was in quite a mess during that time. I did and said many things I wish I hadn't. Although, did you discover that other organisation hiding within your Shield?" Steve choked on his water, coughing roughly. 

"You knew about Hydra?"

"Is that what they were called? I have the ability to sense lies, therefore I could feel there were deep secrets within your Shield. I did try to warn you, you know."

The soldier blinked. "You did?" Natasha made a sound and slammed her book shut. She stood and walked casually to the refrigerator for a drink.

"'You work for liars and murderers', that's what you told me", she growled. "You never tried to play me, you didn't have to. And I didn't play you like I thought I did."

"I'm not sure Agent Romanoff... as I said my mind was quite a mess at the time and so is my memory. Whatever they did to me it took me time to recover from it. I still don't know how they managed to break me." Rolling his shoulder Loki stood and took a few steps at random. He was not comfortable talking about what had happened to him. After giving a general explaination he had said he would answer questions if need be but requested that they didn't ask without need. It caused him to have a bit of an erratic behaviour. Glancing at the floor he seemed to notice something. Smoothly he bent and picked it up. It was Clint's phone. He had forgotten he had dropped it.

"Is this yours Barton?" the god asked holding it out. Making a sound in confirmation he took it, as their fingers brushed a jolt went through the archer's body. Dammit! He was not attracted to the guy who mind controlled him and he didn't want to know what kind of noises the Ass might make in bed. Absolutely not. "Are you well Barton? You look rather heated..." Fuck this crap! Clint groaned silently. What a mess. What a fucking mess.


	4. Theory of life

He listened to the steady heartbeat. It was a relief to see the Trickster regaining his strength but also a bit unnerving. Loki was surprisingly very easy to get along with and he seemed to enjoy the easy banter between the Avengers. Placing the stethoscope over the ribs Bruce listened to his breathing. There were something that sort of crinkled as he listened but couldn't determine what it might be.

"A real doctor should do this... a medical one..." he muttered.

"Have you found something of concern, Banner?"

"It might be nothing but I keep hearing this odd sound. It's like listening to static on a radio."

"Ah... maybe it is my magic? It is working to realign itself which makes it more active than usual."

Bruce felt like someone had slapped him for a moment and then he started laughing. "Yeah, that's probably it. Is magic part of science or something beyond."

"Everything can be science Doctor Banner. It all depends on who looks at it. There are those who studies societies across the universe and views it as science. Other look at the arts and say there is science within. Magic is the same. You can simply use it if able or you can study it as well. In Asgard I have been viewed as a scholar, studying many different subjects. Including theories about magic and more practical observations of its uses."

"Yeah, guess that makes sense. 'Magic is science we don't understand yet' might be 'Magic is just another type of science' instead."

"Indeed, I'd say that's the case. There are a few different types of magic and people have different affinity for them. Humans, for example, tend to have affinity for structure based magic. I believe you like to call them the Mystic arts. Chakra, aura, energy flows. That sort of thing. It is similar to how one would code and use a programme in a computer. Except it is instead applied to reality."

"Humans can use magic?"

"Of course, Midgard is one of the Nine after all. There is a decent amount of sorcerers on your Realm. Thor, and many Aesir, has two different types of magic. They can't be combined and have very little flexibility."

"Right, Thor has lightning and... flight?"

"Actually his first type is storm magic. He just rarely use the full extent of his magic, flying is just one aspect. At the moment he still needs Mjolnir as a focus. His other power is fertility magic."

"Fertility magic? Thor?"

"Oh yes. You wouldn't believe the number of children he has produced, directly or indirectly. Quite a few here on Midgard actually. The old Norse used to worship him and bring him both men and women for his enjoyment."

"Guess I should be thankful Tony used protection. Never thought the big guy was an even bigger playboy."

"Most don't. They think he looks to naive and innocent but he is neither. He has calmed down, grown, but he hasn't changed that much."

"What about your magic?"

"I have Seidr. It is an inborn ability to wield the energies of Yggdrasil. I convert the energy around me and the food I consume into magic that runs along channels between my body and my soul. Then I can use spells to direct my magic into the shape I need. What you can do is determined by your ability to wield the energies of Yggdrasil and knowledge on how to weave spells."

"I have to admit I can barely understand any of this. You are pretty strong then?"

"Doctor Banner, I'm the strongest sorcerer in the Nine Realms. It might not always been properly appreciated but even my detractors give me that much."

"Well, I think we will appreciate it very much."

"To be honest, Banner, that alone would make me happy to work with you mortals."

* * *

 

Another day, another old Hydra base. Seriously, how many did they have? They had searched five others so far. Mostly looking for clues to their plans. It had gone pretty well so far. With Loki's magic they could search more efficiently than before. He found all the secret doors and hidden nooks. By now the guy was a normal presence in their lives. The only thing that marred the picture was the pranks. Because yeah, god of mischief. He was  _the_ prankster. Not that he was malicious or anything. One time he had placed an illusion on Stark that made him look like a woman just as Pepper returned to the compound. Once they realised what was going they had roared with laughter.

"West-East corner clear", came Tony's voice in the comms. "Cap?"

"Southern basement clear", Steve replied. "Moving to the South ground floor."

"Ground still clear", Natasha chimned in.

"All good here", Clint said as he walked slowly through the corridor. Bruce was on standby at the Quinjet.

"All clear, Reindeer games? Loki? You're clear?"

There was a pause before the familiar voice answered. "I... There... something... not..." Following was a low thud. Both Stark and Rogers called the Trickster's name without getting an answer. Looking at his radar the archer saw that he was closest to the god's location. 

"I go check on him", he said, nor waiting for confirmation he began walking. It wasn't far and within minutes he was just outside. With his bow at ready Clint carefully stepped into the room. Loki was lying face down on the floor, unconscious. Quickly the archer did a sweep of the room and any room nearby but didn't find anyone else. Only then did he kneel by the Trickster's side, lifting him up to sitting position leaning against the wall.

Sweat filmed a far to pale face and the breathing sounded laboured. Placing his wrist on Loki's forehead Clint almost recoiled. The god was sporting a high fever, and since his normal temperature was much lower than any human that was really bad.

"Guys, we need to abort mission", he said in the comms.

"Is anyone hurt?" Steve asked.

"Loki is sick somehow, he's unconscious and has a really high fever. I don't like the sound of his breathing either."

"Alright, we won't find anything in this dump anyway", Tony said. "Can you carry him out or do you need help?"

"I should manage", Clint braced himself and lifted the god into his arms. After a moment he found his balance and began walking. A memory invaded his mind as he made his way through the dark corridors.

_They had just settled in the underground base after fleeing Shield. While the rest started setting up camp and see to needed resources Clint stayed near Boss. To his surprise Boss had passed out in the back of the Truck. When he was unable to rouse him he lifted the limp form and carried him to one of the few still furnished rooms. A small bed still had a lumpy mattress. Clint fetched a blanket and tucked Boss in, staying to keep watch. The screaming in his mind got quiet as he sat down at the foot of the bed. For some reason he didn't want the others to see Boss like this. Vulnerable. Exhausted. Pained._

_"Cold..." came a soft mumbling from Boss. There were no more blankets available so Clint simply laid down next the Boss and wrapped himself around the thin body. Sharing his heat. Tension seeped out from the stressed muscles and Boss gave a soft sigh. Settling in and slept._

Shaking his head he kept walking. He hated the flashbacks. There were things he didn't remember and things he didn't want to remember. Like how good it had felt spooning the madman who mind-controlled him. The others were already waiting with a litter when he emerged with his burden. Together they carried their new team member to the Quinjet, worry plain on every face. Bruce took one look at Loki and said they had to get him to the infirmary ASAP. Clint and Natasha secured the litter to the floor before taking their places in the front. The rest had to scramble into a seat as the jet started rising. This was not the time to take things slow.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> PSA: When checking if someone has a fever, use the inside of your wrist. Your palm is warmer than the rest of your body and won't allow you to tell the difference. In comparison the inside of your wrist is your normal temperature. If someone's forehead is feeling warmer than your wrist they likely have a fever.
> 
> (The inside of your wrist also have visible blood vessels close to the surface of the skin, which also helps you tell if someone might have a fever.)
> 
> Some people have a lower base temperature at 36°C and tend to be feverish at 37,5°C. Most thermometers and even many health professionals do not take this into account. It is always wise to know your normal base temperature.


	5. Graveyard of good intentions

It hurt. Everything. Like a fire burning in his veins at the same time as he was drowning in the coldest of waters. Sounds distorted. His eyes wouldn't open. He wanted to hurl, his stomach doing strange twists. It hurt. All of him hurt. Struggling against his own body he tried forcing the thing in his throat out.

Suddenly gentle hands turned him on his side and gently stroked his back. Coughing turned into vomiting and he could finally breathe again. Slowly he peeled his eyelids apart, bracing against the pain. He didn't recognize the room, with all likelihood he was with their healers. Blinking to adjust to the light Loki realised that the one standing beside him were Barton. The archer had just put down a basin and was wetting a towel. With practiced ease he cleaned up the expel from both the Trickster and the bed.

"Want something to drink?" he asked. "You've been out of it for a few days." Loki shook his head, he feared he couldn't stomach anything at the moment. Still, he studied Barton as he handed the basin and towel to a woman before sitting down in an comfortable armchair. This wasn't the behaviour he had expected from the archer.

"Wha..." he tried but his dry throat didn't let him. Thankfully the assassin seemed to understand. 

"You fainted or something during the mission. Had a seriously high fever and for a while it looked like you were not going to make it. Banner has looked kind of green the last couple of days, so it is good to see you awake."

He had fainted? Just like that? Vaguely he could remember feeling strange and then everything had started swimming. His body was still hurting. Closing his eyes again he delved into himself. There was nothing physically wrong with him. Exhaustion ironically. A slight malnutrition. But nothing else. Delving deeper he suddenly knew the source of his sickness. His Seidr had been working non-stop to fix his channels and untangle the mess left by the Curse. It had seemed it had worked. Or rather, it would have if it wasn't for the foreign magic interfering with his own. The two energies were fighting a war and he was the battlefield. With time his Seidr could win but he would be pretty much useless until then. Even worse was the dark magic sticking to the golden thread. It was this thread that made him a god. Long life, strength and durability all came from that. It was also his connection to the Weave. To fate. And the dark magic were interfering with the connection. 

"Hey, did you back to sleep or what?" Barton sounded impatient. Loki opened his eyes again. "Good. Now, I really think you should drink some water." With some help the god managed to sit up, he was then handed a glass with a straw in. There were a faint taste of lemon and ginger in the water. Apparently the archer knew what he was doing. Speaking of which. The mortal confused him, the sometimes almost hungry gaze he saw directed at himself. If he didn't knew any better he would have assumed Barton was desiring him. And not in the "I want you dead" kind of way.

"Thank you", Loki rasped as he handed the cup back.

"Don't sweat it. Have any idea why you clocked out?"

"I fear I do... it looks like me making reparations to your Realm will have to wait."

* * *

 

All the Avengers, Pepper Potts and Nick Fury was seated at the same table. The former Shield director wasn't particularly pleased with them but they didn't care. Fucking freaking magic, Clint thought. Readings made by Stark had confirmed that Loki was indeed fighting a war within himself. The two energies was affecting him physically. 

"He said he would make reparations and he needs to make reparations", Fury said, crossing his arms.

"When he isn't sick he will", Stark retorted. Until then he needs rest and time to get better."

"Have it occurred to you that he might be lying?"

"He's not. I confirmed it myself. Besides, he wanted to work with us."

"The fact is, Fury", Banner said. "If he is sent out in the field, he could die. And I really doubt Asgard would appreciate that."

"Have we heard anything from Asgard anyway?" Pepper asked.

"Nothing", Steve said. "But based on what we know they likely have problems of their own. Thor didn't stay longer than it took to hand over his brother. That makes it quite obvious."

Grimacing Fury leaned back in his chair, massaging his temple. "I get what you are saying but it is not me you will have to convince. The one you will have to convince is the new director of Shield and she is quite a piece of work. There are very few things she wouldn't do. That including hauling Loki's ass to prison or even a lab. Him being sick won't stop her at all."

"Does she need to know?" Tony snapped.

"Don't be an idiot, Stark. If she doesn't know already she will soon. You won't be able to keep him a secret."

"Indeed not", a female voice said as the door opened. "You should not have kept him a secret at all." She wasn't particularly tall but carried herself as if she towered over all of them. Her mouse-coloured hair was cut in a "I want to speak with the manager" style.

"Yo Karen! Ever heard of private property", Stark said, obviously making the same connection. 

"You will call me Dionne, mr. Stark and be thankful I don't arrest all of you for housing a known war criminal."

"With all due respect ma'am", Steve said. "We have evidence he was acting under some form of mind controll."

"So I've been told. I was also informed he was making reparations and now he won't."

"He could die", Bruce said with some force. "Until he is better he can't join us on missions."

"Do I look like I care if he dies, Doctor Banner?" Was this woman for real? Apparently Natasha had a similar thought.

"If he died here we would risk war with Asgard, and they would win. Especially if he died because of our actions. Do you care about that?" The spy had a hard expression and levelled an unimpressed look at the new director. 

"They would avenge a fugitive while having troubles of their own? I do not think so agent Romanoff."

"They would avenge a prince that they sent to safety", Clint pointed out. "His dad even placed some kind of protective spell on him. Why risk it?"

"Agent Barton, your opinion in this matter is of no consequence considering your track record with the criminal. He will be under constant surveillance, follow a strict schedule and his activities will be reported to Shield continuously. Otherwise I will pull the trigger on him myself. Have I made myself clear? Good." With that she strode out. 

"I did tell you she's a piece of work", Fury said. "Be careful."

"Sir?"

"What is it Jarvis?" Tony didn't even look up.

"I believe mr. Odinson could use some assistance. The directors associates were not very gentle with him."

Swearing the inventor stood and hurried through the door. The rest of them were not far behind.

* * *

 

The guy was way to calm considering the Shield agents had pushed a spike through his wrist. Its ends sticking out on either side, bleeding heavily. Diodes were blinking, probably sending signals.

"I slap that woman silly", Pepper growled. "This is inhumane." Tony felt a grim agreement. This was not okay.

"Not to interrupt your raging but I would appreciate it if you could have this removed", Loki said as if he wasn't minutes from checking out from both his sickness and blood loss. Bruce called on some of the doctors, they would have to be careful not to cause anymore damage.

It took painstakingly long for the doctors to prep the minor surgery they would have to preform. Especially since the god didn't respond to any of the anaesthesia. Finally they managed to administer a local anaesthetic that he didn't burn through. During their preparations Clint had used a wet towel to keep the Trickster awake, he had been surprisingly gentle about it. As the doctors wheeled the god away to the OR Tony stayed behind when he noticed that the archer wasn't leaving. The engineer wasn't stupid, he could figure out what was going on. 

"Why don't you just go for it?" he asked making the other jump. Apparently Barton hadn't noticed him staying. 

"Go for what?" he said while glaring at Tony.

"Sex with Loki. I can't blame you, he is a sexy bastard."

"And why would I have sex with Loki?"

"Because you want to? Seriously, I'm not blind. It is pretty obvious you are attracted to him."

"Did you forget he mind-controlled me? Why would I feel any form of attraction to him? Even sexual."

"Like I said, he is a sexy bastard and can be quite charming when he wants to."

"Fuck off Stark."

Shrugging Tony walked out, already making plans to prevent "Dionne" from ever doing something like this again. Forget Asgard, he would be pissed if Shield killed his new buddy. Directly or indirectly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I actually kind of created that saying myself. "The graveyard of good intentions". Turns out it is pretty self-explanatory. Though I haven't managed to translate it to my own language...


	6. Two steps forward

Tony might have been a pain in the ass but he was perceptive. Under any other circumstances Clint would have heeded his advice and made a move. Because, yes he did want to have sex with Loki. Only, the god was seriously sick and kept getting worse. Mostly thanks to director "I don't give a crap" Dionne who kept forcing the guy out on missions and other things rather than resting in bed like he needed. With that in mind the archer wasn't too keen on giving in to his urges. A wank or two could work but it was not the same.

He took a big bite of his breakfast burrito and flushed it down with some Sprite. Not the most nutritious way to start the day but he didn't care. The whole day was dedicated to some serious cardio. Loki shuffled in to the kitchen and collapsed on one of the chairs. Head resting on his arms. As usual these days he looked like shit. Pale, sweaty and tired.

"Shouldn't you be in bed?" Clint asked.

"I rather not draw miss Dionne's attention again, little Hawk." The archer made a face. Seven times Shield had put some kind of tracker in the Trickster's body, never in a gentle or careful way. Each time the doctors on-site had immediately brought him into surgery and removed the device. Finally she accepted a tracker that didn't go inside his body. The one he wore was still some nasty work, Tony was desperately trying to find a way to get it off without alerting Shield.

"Want anything to eat?" Clint asked instead. Loki gave him a wry smile and eyed the burrito. 

"I rather wait a while longer if it is all the same to you." In other words he would wait until someone else showed up. Another of the director's orders, he could only eat what the rest of them were eating. Since he already had trouble digesting food due to the energies wagging war in his body that was yet another issue.

"You take all this surprisingly well. I imagined you would have blasted that woman into bits already."

"I'm not trying to pretend I'm trustworthy, Barton, but I'm not a savage. Sooner or later that woman will overstep. When she does, I will be free of her and Shield."

"You have to survive till then and it ain't looking good. As for trustworthy... I'm a spy and an assassin. So is Natasha. Stark used to sell weapons. Maybe Cap is squeaky clean but I doubt it. Banner, well, technically he is still a fugitive. I'd say you are in good company."

Loki seemed rather pleased with that statement. All in all, it was pretty obvious that the guy had been lonely for a long time. Having companions if not friends was something novel to him. Those green eyes held a certain kind of light that made them feel like jewels.

"Good morning", Rogers greeted them, he eyed the burrito in Clint's hands. "You know, I have this craving for plain yogurt. You want some Loki?"

"Yes, I could do with some yogurt", the god replied. "Thank you."

"No problem." Cap poured a very small bowl and a normal sized bowl with yogurt. He then gave the normal sized bowl to the dark-haired man. At the amused expression he said. "She never said we have to eat the same amount. Only that you have to eat something we eat. If I have a small bowl of yogurt and then make some eggs with bacon that's not her business. You are eating something I'm eating." Chuckling Loki began eating from the bowl, slowly.

"Morning folks! Nice burrito bird brain. Is that all you are eating Spangles? Can't be enough. Hey, Lokes, stop laughing at me." Tony was as usual filled with the kind of energy only the sleep deprived could have. "So, what's the plan for the day?"

"Training", Clint said. "We will be running a lot and running obstacle courses."

"Er... with the suit?"

"No, without. Did you really think you would use the suit."

"One can always hope. What about you, Merlin?"

"I met Merlin once... in case you have forgotten I have to be in the same place as you unless I want miss Dionne to come knocking."

"Right... I set something up", the engineer turned to leave when he stopped in his tracks. "Merlin was real?!"

"Yes, he was the Sorcerer Supreme for a while and cared for the Sanctum located on the British Isles. He was not the most focused person around. Running around placing swords in stones and trying to force someone named Arthur Pendragon to become king. I mean really, you want someone who tried to marry his own sister on the throne. Morgan Le Fay at least had some sense in her brain. She was an unusual human you know. Having Seidr is rare among humans but she did."

Tony stood still for nearly a minute before he ran while shouting. "BRUCE! Merlin was real! Merlin was freaking real! Arthur as well! BRUCE!"

The remaining three burst out in laughter. "Are you telling the truth?" Steve asked.

"Mostly, yes. Morgan and Arthur were not related by blood, while they did have a son the only one who wanted them married was Urther, Arthur's father."

"Wow, even crazier." Clint deadpanned and they laughed some more.

* * *

 

"I don't think this count as training, Stark..."

"It is running and an obstacle course."

"Yes but I'm not the one doing the running."

"Of course you are, look, that's you."

Loki shook his head in disbelief. He was holding a tablet, made by Tony Stark himself, that had some sort of game loaded. Indeed there were a digital version of himself. That were facing some kind of challenge. However... "I still don't think it counts..."

"If I say it counts it counts. Besides, even sick you would swipe the course with us", Tony crossed his arms stubbornly. "This trains you brain. That's also important."

"If you say so... you do know that I can still use my magic?"

"Yeah but it is making you sick though."

"Actually Stark, I could use a release of energy. When it starts building up it causes more damage. And a controlled environment like this is better than in an emergency."

"Huh. Alright, we figure something out. Somehow. Just don't you move from that chair!"

"Don't worry, I won't." Loki made a show of settling back. If was a  _very_ comfortable seat with soft pillows, a warm blanket and protection against both the wind and rain. If it had been sunnier he would also have a sun tent to protect him. In truth he preferred the cold weather to warmer. His heritage no doubt.

So, while the Avengers ran around doing their strange activities he played with the tablet. It kept him occupied for a while and he joined the mortals when they paused for lunch. As he sat down beside Barton he noticed the man tried very hard to not look at him. By now Loki was convinced that the mortal  _did_ feel desire for him. If the archer ever decided to make a move he might be open for it. He hadn't had a lover in decades and didn't dare going for something casual, in case they told anyone. The humans might not care as much about things like that.

"Is there anyway to make this more fun", Stark complained. "It is just soooo meaningless."

"I don't see how", Rogers said. "It is what it is."

"I know that but like, we could use a zombie app or something."

"What is a zombie?" Loki asked politely, directing the question to Barton. Clearing his throat the archer gave a short answer.

"Dead people come back to life."

Frowning the god looked at the other for confirmation and they all said something similar. "Are you talking about draugur?"

"What's dragu... dragr..." Banner said.

"Draugur. Dead people being brought back to life by sorcery. Usually found in old graves."

"Hold it", Barton said, looking pale. "Zombies are real? Like eating people real."

"Why would they eat people? They are dead, they don't need food. They will kill you if you enter their territory but they won't eat you. Stay out of old Norse graves and you will be fine. Besides, they don't like sunlight."

"Didn't plan on visiting any old graves anytime soon."

As they returned to their training and Loki to his chair he had an idea. Using sand as his base he created puppets that looked like draugur but was entirely harmless. It was quite hilarious watching the Avengers' sudden panic at the unexpected company. They managed to laugh about it after fact, agreeing it made their training more effective.

* * *

 

Clint rubbed his hair with a towel as he headed to the solarium. It was usually empty this time of the day and he enjoyed looking at the stars. He felt pretty good despite a whole day of training and fighting fake zombies. That had been quite fun once he caught on. Tony had freaked. To his surprise he saw that the solarium wasn't empty. Sitting on the sofa were Loki. He had a forlorn look on his face. The archer hesitated before sitting down beside the god.

"You okay?"

"Yes Barton, I'm well. I simply wonder about Asgard, what is happening and if Thor is well."

"Missing your bro, huh."

"Surprisingly yes. I have been angry with him for so long that I started to believe I didn't want anything to do with him. Now though I'm starting to realise that he always been there for me. One way or another."

"I get that. I used to have a brother, we fought a lot and things were bad between us. Now though, I wish we had tried to work things out. But that's not possible any longer."

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be. It is in the past and I rather not dwell on it for too long."

Loki nodded solemnly and gazed at the sky above. He was beautiful like that. The black hair that curled unless he used oils, the green eyes that had an inner light, small wrinkles in the corner of his eyes that said he used to smile a lot. Even with the sickness wearing him out he was still a sight to behold.

"Barton?" When had he taken hold of the god's face? Those orbs watched him closely. A pink tongue darted across pale lips. And Clint couldn't hold it in anymore. He pressed their lips together, using the first opening he got to slip his tongue inside. Caressing Loki's mouth with it. Oh how good the Trickster tested. Moaning Hawkeye kept the kiss going, barely noticing his hand slipping under the shirt, kneading pale skin. He knew in the back of his mind that Loki could have easily thrown him off if he didn't like it. That he was allowed to continue spoke volumes. 

It made him bold. The wandering hand slipped inside the Trickster's pants, finding him member. Still kissing heavily he started massaging that length hungrily. Panting he looked into green eyes that met his need with a need of its own.

"Shit, you are one sexy bastard", Clint said in a thick voice, barely able to keep his hand from squeezing to hard from pure lust.

"Oh, my little Hawk. You have no idea. I would be more than happy to show you." Loki smirked and nipped at his chin playfully. "Do you think you can satisfy a god?"

"Don't know before I try."

"True. You just have to answer one more question."

"What? My favourite colour?"

Loki chuckled, still looking way to sexy. "No. The question is, do you want to put this", he palmed Clint's erection, "inside me?"

It was a miracle he didn't lose his mind right there and then but it was close.


	7. One step backwards

The sex was pretty vanilla but Clint had no complaints. He had an experienced partner who seemed to relish in the lack of judgement he got for preferring bottoming. Their lips met in a hungry kiss, undressing without hurry. It felt so good. Loki tipped his head back, showing his neck. The archer licked and brushed his teeth against the sensitive skin. Pulling him down the Trickster spread his legs invitingly, allowing him to settle between. Since the god was sturdier and stronger than humans there wasn't any issue with putting his weight on Loki's chest. Now naked they both let their hands touch any patch of skin in reach. Bucking slightly Clint rubbed against the god, getting a guttural groan in response. The archer reached for the little box next to his bed, grabbing a condom. He was faced with a sexy grin. Bastard... he thought fondly. Using protection had not been an issue. Loki accepted it without any fuss and pointed out the positives when asked.

The god didn't really need any preparation but they would have Bruce breathing down their necks if they skipped it. Pouring some oil in his hand Clint reached down and softened the area before putting on the condom. Using the oil still on his hand he rubbed the frankly impressive lenght before an impatient tug made him push inside. A sigh slipped pass the god's lips, Clint kissed him over and over while rocking his hips. This was bliss. Pure bliss. Chuckling Loki ran a finger along his spine and Oh my sweet pepper sauce that felt good. Slim fingers combed through his hair, encouraging him to keep their lips locked.

A while later the archer collapsed, gasping for air and trying to get down from the endorphins crashing through his body. The slightly colder body beneath him felt good. He decided to pull it closer, nuzzling the skin, kissing those tasty lips.

"I didn't picture you as a cuddler, Little Hawk", Loki mused.

"You make me one." Clint listened to that lovely chuckle, wanting to swallow it and keep it safe. "So good. Hey, can I ask you a question?"

"Go ahead", slim fingers came up to play with his hair. He shivered. 

"Why is it such a big deal who tops and who bottoms?"

Sighing the Trickster gave him a soft kiss. "Asgard is a warrior society. Manliness is very important. In a sexual relationship between two men the one receiving is seen as the lesser. It can be viewed as a dominance. As a prince it could have rather far-reaching consequences if it were revealed I was the one receiving. The truth is my Hawk that I like being the one to spread my legs. To be bedded as one would a woman. Even with my lovers, who at least didn't spread the tales, was fairly judgemental about how easily I submitted."

"That's shitty. If you like something you like something. You are two doing the tango either way."

"Mmm, that's very true." Loki was moving against him, seeking friction. He obviously had more libido and stamina than the puny human. Feeling rather spent Clint slid down instead, and took the proud member in his mouth. The words this elicited sounded very much like curses. Smirking somewhat he set about getting more of those reactions.

* * *

 

"You can't be serious."

"I can assure you Stark that I'm very serious."

"You want to send the sick guy out against armed forces Fury?" Crossing his arms the engineer glared at the former director. "Do you want to start an intergalactic war?"

"This is not my decision, Stark", Fury gave him an unimpressed look. "For once I actually agree with you. We can't let anything happen to Loki or we will face the wrath of Asgard."

"Great, so don't send him into battle."

"Again, this is not my decision. I've tried convince director Dionne that her repeated harassment on the god of mischief will misfire."

"Yeah, no kidding. What do you think is going to happen when Big Brother returns, eh?"

" _I_ know that. Which is why you better come up with a contingency plan. Where is that bastard anyway?"

"He's with Barton."

"With Barton? Why the heck would the two of them be together?"

Like I tell you the truth Tony thought as he kept his expression carefully blank. "Because 'Director Dionne' demands that he is watched nearly every hour of the day." Which was true. "Barton are just having his turn of god-sitting." Which was not but Fury didn't have to know that Hawkeye and mr. Magic were shagging. Ironically it worked out pretty well. As long as Clint was nearby the tracking device didn't send out an alarm. The longer he spent nearby, the longer any of them could be gone before having to return. This gave Loki plenty of time to rest properly and even the chance to eat what he actually needed. When the two were together they usually were taking a tumble or resting after one.

Apparently they enjoyed each others company. A lot. Not that Fury needed to know this. When he thought about it he wasn't sure Steve and Natasha knew the real nature of their relationship. Heck, Tony himself didn't know if their relationship was purely sexual or if either of them had started to develop romantic emotions as well. They themselves probably didn't know. 

"Whatever. Just make certain that there are plans in motion in case something happens. We do NOT want a war."

Agreed. Now he just had to come up with something within like a week. He couldn't just stuff the guy into one of his suits, Shield would collectively choke at mere idea. So he needed a different plan.

"Jarvis are mr. and mr. still doing their thing?"

"I believe they are both sleeping, sir. Mr. Barton returned from a mission this morning and went directly to mr. Odinson's room."

"Alright, got it. Let me know if they decide to bless us with their presence."

"Of course, sir."

* * *

"Are you having sex with Loki?" Natasha's question caught him of guard. They had another mission that evening and was preparing their gear. She had a very displeased expression. That annoyed him for some reason. He never commented on her escapades. 

"So what if I am?"

"Clint, he mind-controlled you. Doesn't that bother you?"

"It did. But once it became clear he was also a victim, well, I'm more bothered about anyone who can break a god." Nat sniffed unhappily but the archer didn't care. He liked being with Loki. When they didn't have sex they were talking, exchanging stories, trading jokes and past pranks. Often they would simply sleep, enjoying the warmth of another body. The Trickster didn't like being in hot water or hot weather but he truly enjoyed warmth from someone else. 

"I'm just worried about you."

"I know that but I'm fine. You like him as well."

"He is not a bad person but that doesn't mean I want to have sex with him."

"Good for you. I do. And I rather get this mission over with."

"This conversation isn't finished Clint."

"Watch me."

* * *

 

It was well after midnight when his Little Hawk crawled under the blankets to join him. Spooning him. There was a chill to Clint's skin that likely came from having spent a long time outdoors without appropriate clothing. Loki placed on hand on top of the archer's, using his thumb to rub the callused hand. He never learnt, did he. Always ready with his heart in his hands, hoping to have it accepted and receiving a heart in turn. So far his heart had only been bruised and sometimes even started bleeding. Yet, he still kept holding it out at any sign of affection. Even know his heart was crying for the man who held on to him. Telling the god to expose that crying organ. Angrily Loki tried telling it to stop without much success. He did want to be loved after all. So very much so.

 


	8. The wrong turn

Why did they have to fight an active Hydra cell? The base was not that big but housed a serious number of soldiers and fighters. They had split of in teams of two but only Clint and Loki remained together. Which wasn't really a surprise. Hulk did whatever he wanted and Stark wasn't a team player on the best of days. Not to mention that Steve had some personal stakes when it came to Hydra. Teaming up with the god of mischief had its perks. The god had hundreds of years of experience when it came to fighting and he utilised all of it. He used knives, magic, kicks and fists. While Thor was all power Loki was all finesse. Not one movement wasted, no energy useless. Even with Clint in the equation he still managed his strategy with ease, downing Hydra soldier after Hydra soldier. The fact that he didn't show any mercy was a positive in the archer's book. They had cleared the lowest basement level but more soldiers were coming. 

"Loki, we need to go", Hawkeye called.

"I don't think I can, Little Hawk..." the strain in the Trickster's voice made him freeze. Loki was facing the wall, one hand out steadying himself, breathing harsh and shallow. In an instant Clint had rushed over. He could here the shouts from more soldiers.

"Come on Boss, we need to move!" The nickname slipped out and for once it didn't make him cringe.

"Secret room... just around... corner. I can open it..."

"Alright, come on, lean on me. This way right. Okay, good. Here?" Stretching out one hand the god touched the wall and a thick door swung open.

"Can't be opened from the outside", he mumbled. The archer lifted him to his arms and carried him inside, placed him on a narrow cot before hurriedly closing the door. Then he took in their hiding place. It seemed to be some kind of bunker or bombshelter. While small it was well prepared. Bottles of water and easy to prepare food. Even a little trangia kitchen. He almost laughed when he saw a whole shelf with instant noodles. There were a sink and running water as well as a small bathroom. The bottles of water was likely just in case. Thankfully there were also a blanket he could cover the shivering god with. 

"Clint, where are you?" Natasha called in the comms. 

"In some kind of bunker. Loki collapsed, sickness not injury."

"Are you in immediate danger?" Steve asked.

"No, the door can't be opened from the outside and there are some provisions."

"Where is the bunker?" Nat again.

"On the lowest basement level. Should I try bring him up? Get him to the jet?"

"Absolutely not!" Stark yelled. "If you two are safe there, stay until this is over. Bruce is still Hulk and I think there are more Hydra on the ground. We will keep you posted."

"Tony..." Cap said. "We should help them."

"We will, when we actually can do so. For now they need to stay safe. If Loki gets captured by Hydra in his state..."

He could die and they would have a war on their hands. Not a pretty thought. Disconnecting from the active line Clint decided to make some instant noodles. After some searching he found an electric kettle. With some effort he managed to make Loki eat some of it.

"This is horrible..."

"I know, but you need the food."

"The others..."

"They are still fighting. Told us to stay put. To dangerous out there."

"Ease my Little Hawk, we need to trust them. A surprising sentiment from the god of mischief. "At the moment, this is probably the safest place we can be."

By the time Clint had eaten himself and found a trash bag the Trickster was asleep. There were only one bed and no more blankets or pillows so he joined Loki on the cot. Pulling the blanket over both of them while cradling the black-haired man. Again he was reminded of the time during the invasion when he had shared his body heat to keep "Boss" warm. A lot had happened since. The pale neck was exposed so Hawkeye pressed a kiss to it. Grounding himself. He wasn't quite willing to admit that his feelings were not just sexual desire anymore. Spooning closer he too was soon asleep.

* * *

 

This was a bit of a disaster. Some guy had thought it was a brilliant idea to use a bomb to bring down the building. Only it didn't work as intended as the explosion pushed things outwards. Not down. Unfortunately the staircase to the basements levels were blocked. Which was why they were currently hauling debris. According to Bruce both Clint and Loki were asleep. Likely unaware of what was going on. A small blessing. Tony heaved and lifted another cement wall out of the way when Romanoff came up beside him.

"Did you know Clint has a sexual relationship with Loki?"

"Who do you think I am? Of course I knew,  its pretty obvious and Lokes is a sexy bastard after all. Look, Natasha, they are both grown men. Don't get involved."

"Is there anyone who doesn't know?"

"Several I hope. And probably Steve. Things could get nasty if the wrong people found out."

"Glad we are on the same page. Looks like we got a clear."

Once they reached the lowest basement level they called Barton to open up the bunker. The place had not been disturbed at all by the bomb and the archer was a little wild-eyed at seeing the destruction. Loki didn't wake up as they moved him to the jet. His condition had taken a turn for the worse. Again. Enough was enough. Tony hid in a corner and called Pepper.

"Hey Peps, are we still sponsoring that human rights lawyer? Do you think you can contact him for me? We have a case for him."

* * *

 

Brian Colts was a man in his mid-thirties who was dedicated to help people in need. This meant representing the little people against the huge corporations. Seeing this Stark had decided to sponsor him, which allowed him to do more good work. He looked over the documentation and winced. Even for a war criminal this was appalling treatment and quite unconstitutional. The fact that the one giving the orders seemed to lack any kind of record was also worrying. Going only by the name of Dionne she didn't show up anywhere. Maybe it wasn't even her real name.

Shield however were a governmental organisation. As such they had to adhere to the law. Any infraction had to be dealt with. There were some leeway for security reasons but nothing like this. Putting someone in mortal danger? Risking war? Causing unnecessary harm more than once to make a point? It didn't take much to put together a casefile and handing it to the billionaire. With it he could put pressure on Shield and take it to court if need be. Just in case Brian Colts made two more copies and kept the original. The copies were stored as physical papers rather than digital files. Just in case.

* * *

 

As the fever went down Loki started to regain the use of mind. Slowly he opened his eyes, staring at the ceiling without truly taking it in. His body was hurting again. He couldn't tell if it was from the warring energies or his own magic needing release. One he could do something about, the other not so much.

"Welcome to the land of the loving", sitting down beside him on the bed Clint looked relieved. "How are you feeling?"

"Hurting..."

"Goes figure. You still have a fever so take it easy alright."

"I doubt the director will like that."

"Stark has managed to cage her for now. She has backed down on several of her previous demands. Though she still wants one of us in your presence as much as possible."

"How horrible, I can't imagine one of you actually enjoying that."

"You little shit", it was said fondly. "You're lucky you are a sexy bastard." Loki chuckled before it turned into a coughing fit. The wet sound was a bit worrying and the Hawk had a worried expression. 

"I will be fine", the god lied. "I just need rest." He was beginning to doubt he  _could_ recover. The dark energies had gravitated more and more to his divine core. It couldn't destroy it but it could wreck him completely. And that didn't take into account all the other things it did to his body.

"Don't lie to me", Barton caressed his cheek. "You are not getting better, are you?" Enjoying the hand on his feverish the Trickster decided to tell the mortal the truth.

"It is more complicated than that. The dark magic keeps attempting changes to my body and my own magic keeps fixing it. My divinity is also under attack."

"Your divinity?"

"Yes. In all of us who are called gods there is a core, it manifests as a golden thread. We can still die but it is less likely to do so from outside causes. He, the Curse, tried to rip it out and rip it apart. Of course he failed but his attempts left a taint on the thread. It weakens me."

"Makes sense I guess", when had Clint climbed into the bed? "How is this dark power trying to change your body?"

"You know about my fluctuating appetite? The reason for that is the dark magic attempting to remove my gastric organs while my own magic fights to keep it in place."

"Shit... that's... that's really bad. Like, I can't imagine. Then having more stress on top of it."

"Mmm, I suppose." His Little Hawk had pulled him into a tight embrace. "You are acting a bit unusal."

"You could have died", Hawkeye said harshly. "I'm not okay with that."

"Barton..."

"Shut up. I... I think I'm in love with you, you bastard. And it's not like me."

"Oh..." why did he have to be tearing up. Just because someone told him they were in love with him. Only... "I don't think anyone has ever said that to me before."

"Get used to it your ass."

"I'm over a thousand years old..."

"Not listening." Just like that a pair of warm lips were pressed to his own.  Loki sighed contentedly and relaxed. Not everything had to be a fight. Maybe he could get something he really wanted for once, without having to struggle for it.

* * *

 

The director of Shield, called Dionne, stormed through the corridors of the new headquarters. She was pissed. How dare Stark attempt to blackmail  _her_? Did Loki really have that much sway over the Avengers. For now she had retreated but she wasn't done. Slamming the doors open she strode into the lab. The one she sought looked up from his work.

"Have you had any breakthroughs about the serum?" she asked.

"Not yet", Ferren said. "Rather than encouraging physical strenght it has another rather unfortunate effect."

"And that effect is?"

"We only tested it in mice but it seem to cause a heavy increase in their sex drive. A couple of females didn't make it, their hearts gave up."

"What about the males?"

"They became aggressive in their approach but instead of dying they just passed out."

Interesting. Very interesting. "How would you hypothesize the reaction in a human?"

"I'd say they would be rather likely to force themselves on someone. But it is hard to say."

"We have some Hydra agents in the cells below. Test it on them. Have them in both a solitary cell and a shared cell."

"Erm... is that ethical? And why?"

"Don't ask questions, just do it!" Dionne huffed angrily and swepped out. An agent approached her with a folder. She opened it and after a moment she read it again properly. "Are you sure?"

"It is without doubt. Hawkeye is compromised. Do you want to take action?"

"No", she smiled to herself, thinking of the serum. "I have a better idea to kill my birds." The agent eyed her in confusion but wisely didn't say anything.


	9. Stay a turn

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter contains non-consensual drug use, off-screen, mutual, rape. Nothing graphic but please be aware.

_"We thought we offer you the opportunity to do some tests", the scientists from Shield had said. "It is our understanding that there have been little to no improvement in your condition. Maybe we can find something that might help you. We do have more resources than the average doctor."_

_The prince lifted an eyebrow and leaned back against the sofa. "My problem is magical, I doubt you medicine could help me."_

_"Isn't it still worth a try? We could at least see if we can ease the physical part of it."_

_"Such persistence. Very well, but you will not take any blood or tissue samples. And I will be allowed to return here by the end of the day."_

_"Of course. We will see to it."_

See to it my ass, Clint thought. Loki was supposed to return the night before but had still not left the Shield facility. Stark had been muttering about corrupt governments and whatnot. After making a call the archer was allowed to come to pick the up the god. He did wish he had been allowed to bring his bow inside but they had taken it from him.

"Agent Barton, a moment." Growling he turned to the medic.

"What?" The guy shrank back in his white lab coat, looking uncomfortable. 

"There is a new vaccine you need to take. If you don't have a current infection it would be advisable to take it now."

"I'm busy. Another time."

"I'm very sorry agent Barton but only inoculated personnel is allowed further inside the building and to work in the field. The director's orders..."

"Fine. Do it quick and get it over with. I have a god to fetch."

"Erm... of course." The nameless medic took him to small infirmary and within short order he had administered the shots. "Now, it is suggested that you take it easy for a while."

"Yeah yeah, just let me get Loki and then we are done." Looking a bit panicky the guy almost ran ahead of Clint and stopped outside a secure door.

"He's inside. Knock when you are ready to leave."

"Just leave the door open?"

"I'm sorry. Protocol."

Great. He stepped inside and the door slammed shut behind him. It was a fairly small room with white walls and a rather thick green carpet. No furniture and the light came from florescent lamps embedded in the wall. Lying on his back were Loki, dressed only in the soft undershirt he liked and soft cotton pants he would never wear. In two strides Clint was at his side, kneeling down and placing a hand on his shoulder.

"Hey, Loki. Are you okay?" he spoke softly. Aware that surveillance equipment were likely in place. Those beautiful green eyes opened, fixating on him despite the worn face.

"Barton", the Trickster said with a surprisingly steady voice. "Don't blame yourself." Dumbstruck by the unexpected statement Clint opened his mouth as a strange sensation tingled in his body. 

"Wha..." 

Next thing he knew he was sprawled on the floor, feeling strange. His hair was wet, his breathing rapid as if he had been running. A strange ache. Then he realised that he was partially lying on top of Loki who looked even worse than before and was unconscious. Their clothing were in disarray and yet there were nothing that could explain what had happened. Slowly getting to his feet the archer went to bang on the door. An agent was waiting outside. The medic were nowhere in sight.

"Get me his clothes, then we are out of here", why was his voice raspy and why had the agent an expression between pity and disgust. "Well?"

"...just a moment agent Barton..."

Never in his life had he been so grateful that Tony had installed Jarvis in his cars. He settled Loki in the backseat, adjusting it to act as a bed or litter. Courtesy of Stark Industries, combining a normal car with the possible needs of an Avenger. Then he collapsed in the drivers seat, feeling drained.

"Jarvis, please take us home... I can't do this."

"Of course mr. Barton. May I trouble you to place your hands on the steering wheel? I do the rest." True its word the A.I started the engine and drove them back to the compound. Banner, Stark and Cap was waiting for them. Steve and Bruce hurriedly carried the unconscious deity to the infirmary while Tony saw to Clint.

"What happened? We expected both of you back hours ago."

"I don't know Tony. There is time missing in my memory and I really don't like it. Also I'm feeling sick."

"...looks like you could use the medbay as well. Come on then." Loki had regained consciousness by the time they made their way to the hospital room. His green eye studied the archer who almost collapsed on the bed. Still looking worn and was clearly on the verge of passing out the Trickster still spoke.

"It was not your fault." What that meant, he had no idea. By the time he hit the pillow he was already half asleep.

* * *

 

"Tony", Bruce shifted uncomfortably. His friend turned around. They were both tired. With Loki and Clint still out of it things were tense. He held the paper like a shield. A poor one. "You should look at this." The engineer took the papper and read, his face grim.

"Are you sure?"

"I wish I wasn't. But they are in a relationship, why would..."

"Did you see this", Tony showed him a section of text. Their toxscreen. It looked odd. "They were given something and not the same thing. It could explain why they are unconscious."

"Loki is weaker due to the sickness... but we need some kind of proof surely. More than this."

"Leave that to me."

* * *

 

Great. He woke up and was told to go see Stark and Banner. It was important apparently. They were in the lab looking at some screens when he entered. Their grim expressions made him wary.

"Barton", Stark said. "There is something you need to see."

"It won't be pretty..." Banner said. "But you need to know." Know what? He narrowed his eyes in suspicion but approached the screen nevertheless. It was from the Shield headquarters the day he went to retrieve Loki. The time he was missing. He watched himself getting the shot, entering the room and kneeling beside the god. Then...

 _"Don't blame yourself._ " the Trickster had said. Then... Clint didn't realise he had backed away until he hit the wall. He could see how all rationality left his eyes. The things he was doing on the screen. Loki repeating "not your fault" over and over. Despite obvious pain and discomfort. Despite what was happening and he felt sick just watching. His knees gave out, hitting the floor. He couldn't breathe. How? Why? It wasn't... it shouldn't...

"Clint, it wasn't your fault", the familiar, silky voice made him raise his head. The god of mischief stood in front of him. There were no fear, no disgust and no hostility. "It wasn't your fault."

"Not my fault? I... I  _raped_ you! That's..." the archer realised he was crying. His chest were aching. Loki kneeled down beside him and brought him close, holding him in his arms.

"You didn't. They, Shield, did this to us both. You are just as much of a victim as I am. As soon as I saw you I knew what they were up to."

"But I hurt you..."

"I've been through worse. You were actually as careful as you could in that situation. I saw your face, Clint. I know you didn't want it. You are not at fault. You are not at fault."

Bawling like a child Clint buried his face in Loki's shirt. He was shaking. Feeling sick and drained. The god didn't say anything. Simply held him and rubbed his back. Letting him cry his heart out. 

* * *

 

He was tempted to delete the footage but knew they needed it. This was a step to far. After all this time he still had not managed to find out the true identity of "Dionne". As it happened however, their resident god had kept his eyes and ears open. Shield had severely underestimated the distance Loki could see and hear. He had overheard a conversation between two Hydra prisoners that indicated that some kind of drug had been used on them and the effect it had had. That was how he realised what was going on with Barton. While not a lot to go on he had also heard someone in the lab referring to the director as Alwick. It didn't tell the Trickster much but for Tony, it was all he needed.

Leanne Alwick. Her profile fit to a T. The haircut was different on the photo but he still recognised her. At first nothing really stood out about her. Certainly not anything that warranted her becoming director. So, he called the only one who might have answers.

"Hey Nick! How're you doing?"

"Stark, what have I told you about calling me like this?"

"Yeah yeah, whatever. I need to ask you something."

"What? And I swear if it is which tie you should wear to the gala..."

"Why would I ask you that? You have no taste. No, my question is: What do you know about Leanne Alwick?"

"Alwick? How the heck do you know about her? And why are you asking?"

"Answer my question first and I will answer yours."

"Fine. Leanne Alwick was an operational agent that was often marked for her brutal and sometimes unethical solutions to her missions. She rarely had any empathy and didn't care about anyone who might have been in the way. That's actually one of the reasons I sent Barton after Romanoff instead of her. Finally Coulson suggested that she be transferred to a high security prison as one of the wardens. I agreed. She stopped a prison break when Hydra was exposed but I haven't heard about her since."

"Did you ever talk to her face to face?"

"No, I left that to Coulson and once she became a warden she was no longer my problem. Now answer my question, how the heck do you know about agent Alwick?"

"Well, it turns out that director Dionne of Shield is actually Leanne Alwick. And she has done some pretty bad things very recently."

"Dionne is Alwick? That's worrying. What has she done?"

"She gave Barton a drug that caused him to rape Loki and then forget about it. Technically I'd say she raped both of them by proxy. Seems like they were not the only ones, she has been experimenting on Hydra prisoners kept at the headquarters."

There was a stunned silence and then Fury lived out to his name with a long litany of curses that went on for quite a while. "Don't do anything until I get to the compound. I will make that bitch regret ever being born."

"Got it. Hey, mind if I invite a humans' rights lawyer I know?"

"Just do it Stark!" Tony didn't bother ending the call properly, he simply touched the end call botton and leaned back in his chair.

"Jarv, collect everything about Leanne Alwick. Let's see how many skeletons she is hiding in her closet."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I will reiterate that both Loki and Clint was victims as neither was a willing participant.


	10. No good

He would have loved a front seat but sitting in bed and watching it on TV wasn't so bad either. Dutifully he ate his pieces of watermelon while trying to ignore the churning in his gut. Clint was sitting with him, his lover needed to see this as well. The archer had descended into a depression following their violation and refused to do anything intimate. Which was annoying, Loki was fine, but understandable. A mousy woman was reporting on the news.

"This is likely the last nail in the coffin for Shield. First it was revealed that Hydra existed still within the organisation and now it has been discovered that under its new director Shield committed several crimes against human rights. The same woman who prior to getting such a high position already had committed several crimes in the name of service. Her latest act was forcibly inject a drug in one of her agents to induce sexual violence and had him assault, unwillingly, his current partner. Even if she didn't hold the needle herself, her agents acted on her orders."

A young man was then shown outside what looked like the compound. A stage had been set and Loki could see Stark in the background. "We are standing here awaiting the press conference called by Tony Stark, aka, Iron Man. Former Shield agents have reported that allegedly the Avengers are housing the war criminal Loki. He was supposed to do reparations but did then refused to do his job."

A handful of popcorn bounced of the TV. Clint was glaring at the reporter and stuffed the next handful of popcorn in his mouth. Smiling to himself the god kept watching as Stark stepped up on the platform to address the journalists present.

"Alright people, calm down and I will explain. Yes, Loki is currently here at the compound. Ah ah ah!" The starting outrage was quelled immediately. "What did I say about being calm? He is here because it is the safest. And before any of you start shouting again, we have evidence that Loki, prior to coming to Earth, was tortured and was likely under some amount of mind-controll. Yes, Loki did agree to do reparations regardless of the circumstances and did so willingly. However, he became sick and our doctors can do nothing about it. He is still ill and needs rest. Him joining us Avengers could very well cause his death. That's why he has been sitting out."

"Mr. Stark, some would say he deserve it?" One reporter shouted.

"Didn't you just hear me say he was tortured? Really? Seems like Shield kept even more secrets. You all know Thor right? God of Thunder? Yeah, Loki is his baby brother and is also a prince of Asgard. He was sent here because they wanted him to be safe. What do you think would happen if he died because of us puny mortals?"

"He gives Odin way to much credit... he didn't bother with the time I spent in the void, he just threw me into the dungeons. He can fickle with his fatherly love. Thor on the other hand would not be happy." Loki chewed on a piece of melon.

"He sent you here didn't he? And used a protection spell?" Clint snaked his arms around the Trickster's waist. "I'm sure he wants you to be safe. Besides, if people believe Asgard would turn Earth into ash if something happened to you they will keep away. And not hurt you again..."

"Oh, for the Norns sake. Clint, I'm fine. Yes it was an unpleasant experience but not because I was hurting but because I could see the pain on your face. Because I knew you would never want to do anything like that. That woman didn't care about any consequences, now she won't hurt anyone ever again."

"Is it true that Loki is in a relationship with one of the Avengers?" One person on the TV said. "Considering there is only one woman on the team does this mean he is with a man?"

"I'd say that is his business. We have already established that he is not dangerous and if he is happy why question it?"

"Don't you think that it could compromise any of you to be in a relationship with a known criminal?"

"You do know who you are talking to, right? I was once called the Merchant of Death. It's all about perspective. Besides, the last one who claimed Loki had compromised someone is now being charged with multiple accounts of crimes against human rights."

Having had enough Loki switched off the TV, Stark could handle himself and he was growing tired anyway. Chill fingers touched his face, Clint frowned. 

"You have a fever again. They have become more frequent recently. Should I call Bruce?"

"He can't do anything. My body is simply under stress, as usual." His lovely Little Hawk still seemed worried. "You could stay with me. Keeping me safe and warm."

"Safe... I don't think I qualify."

"What about you let me decide that? I want you my Hawk, I want you close, I want your touch. Or do I disgust you now?"

"What? No! No, I love you but..." the archer blinked when the Trickster covered his mouth with one hand.

"Could you say that again?" Loki watched him intently as he lowered his hand. Clint looked confused but repeated his words.

"I love you but..." then he stopped on his own, suddenly hearing his own words. "I love you, Loki. That's why it hurts so much, knowing what I did to you."

Shifting so he could lean on his Hawk the god rubbed his arm affectionately. "If you love me, forgive yourself and accept that you didn't do it willingly. I told you, I want you."

And Clint caressed his cheek before pressing a kiss to his lips. Fever or no fever, they had missed each other even while side by side.

* * *

 

He had been cleared. Then cleansed over and over. Finally he would be able to go to Midgard to see his brother. Thor stood impatiently in the observatory. It had been months, people were still falling sick because of the miasma, affecting the very young and elderly worst. He had managed thanks to his youth and stamina. To make sure he wouldn't become truly sick they were sending him to Midgard. After being purified more times than he cared to remember. This was the last one. The moment the healers finished he would be sent through the Bifrost. Eir spoke the last words of the incantation and he was on his way. He landed on the grass outside the compound, jogging towards the door. Throwing it open he saw all his friends startle at the sight of him but he could only focus on one.

Loki stood slowly from a sofa, he seemed tired and sickly yet smiled at his brother. Overwhelmed Thor strode over and folded the other into a bear-hug. A low huff came but then slim arms answered the hug.

"I've missed you, little brother", the Thunderer said. 

"Really? Then why didn't you come before now?" The smile on the Trickster's lips took the sting out of the words. Seeing the grim expression however, the smile faded. "Thor?"

"When that  _thing_ left Asgard he left behind miasma. Many have fallen ill. I was just recently cleared myself. Before that it was to dangerous. I only came before to save your life. Had you stayed the miasma would have killed you." Loki grimaced. 

"I don't need help with that..."

"You look unwell, brother. Has something happened?"

"It is my magic, the dark energy is still affecting my body." At that the god of thunder could only hold him close again.

"I thank you as well my friends, for keeping my brother safe. Especially you Barton as I know you have grievances towards him." At that Loki snorted. "What's so funny? Have you caused more grievances?"

"No, not quite", the god of mischief stepped away from him and walked up to the archer. The other Avengers looked oddly amused. "My Little Hawk and I have sorted out any past grievances."

"Your little..." Thor's brother only used petnames towards people he. "By the great Tree. Really? You would seduce him?"

"Hey, have you seen your brother?" Stark said loudly. "The guy is sexiness on two legs. Trust me, no seduction needed."

"Is that so? Is that why you still haven't convinced miss Potts to marry you? Because you find seduction redundant?" It was an odd sight, seeing people laugh at Loki's quips. "What about you my Hawk? Is seduction redundant?"

"It has its perks", Barton shrugged and casually placed an arm around the black-haired god's waist. "You are a sexy bastard after all." He got a chuckle in return and they kissed lightly. It all seemed so light hearted and lively. Warming Thor's heart seeing his baby brother surrounded by such good friends. Then Loki started coughing. His whole body shook, the sound he made was rough and painful. The archer made his lover sit down again, his expression worried. 

"Another fit..." Banner muttered. "They have gotten worse lately."

"Brother?" The Thunderer knelt down at the Trickster's side. "Are you ill?"

"In a way... it has been like this for a while. Just recently got more... insistent." Loki pressed a hand to his abdomen, he didn't seem to notice his own action. Gently Thor placed his own hand over it. Then he frowned, confusion and worry gnawing at him. 

"Loki, why would you be pregnant?" The whole room fell quiet. "I know shapeshifting has no affect on your fertility and Jotun males can't conceive."

"Thor, are you absolutely sure? Is it your fertility powers that tells you this?" The god of mischief looked at him intently. 

"What else would it be? There is a child growing inside you but I don't know how how."

The dark prince was quiet for a while, deep in thought. Then he started swearing. "It's because of him. The Curse. For months the dark magic has tried to force changes on my body. This is another such change. It grew me a womb."

"But", Barton looked slightly panicked, "we have always used protection when we... well..."

"Except..." Stark began and once more the room grew quiet. Everyone looked uncomfortable. What had happened?

"But if it was this dark magic that grew the womb and allowed you to get pregnant, doesn't that mean your magic is trying to erase that addition", Banner said. "Loki... maybe we need to consider an abortion... this can't be good for you."

"No!" Only the archer's hands on his shoulder kept the dark prince from rising to his feet. "This might not be what I had planned but I won't kill my child because it is inconvenient."

"Loki, you could die! The strain on your body, it will likely become to much if the pregnancy progresses."

"I said no! I respect those who chooses abortion as they have their reasons but I won't do it. Let me go, Clint, I want to be alone." The Trickster stormed off.

"Loki, wait!" Barton jogged after him, both of them disappearing. Thor looked at the remaining mortals in utter confusion.

"You might want to sit down, Thunder pants", Stark told him. "It will take a while to fill you in."

* * *

 

"Loki, come on. Let's us just talk, alright?" Panting Clint was thankful when his lover finally stopped. Then he noticed the god was shaking. "Lokes?" Slowly he walked closer. As he did he realised that Loki was crying.

"My life is such a mess", he sobbed. "Everything around me keeps falling into pieces. It breaks me..."

"Hey, hey", the archer swept the taller man into his arms, offering comfort. "It's okay. We will get through this. You will be okay!"

"Will I? Banner is right, Clint. This could kill me but somehow..." his hand hovered over his abdomen. "... I don't want to let go of this. Though that's probably selfish."

"You just found out you are pregnant, I'm honestly impressed you didn't freak out completely. I know I am. And I'm not the one with a bun in the oven."

"No? This is your child as well, yet I haven't even asked you what you think."

Clint sighed. "Look, I admit it. It's scary, thinking I might become a dad but it is also scary that I might lose you. You are not supposed to die for another four thousand years."

"My Hawk... you soul is too pure for this world." Loki kissed him softly. 

"Yeah, I doubt that but I appreciate the sentiment."

"Don't sell yourself short, my love. You have a good heart and I will treasure it for as long as I can." A crash was heard from the large common room. "Hmm, I'm guessing they've told Thor about Shield's actions."

They chuckled.


	11. Through fire

With Thor present Loki were noticeably less pleasant. Not that he was mean or rude, he was still very poised. No, that wasn't an issue but he was a bit sharper in his remarks, snapped quicker and could become a tad vicious. Unfortunately Tony couldn't exactly blame him because boy did the thunder god pester his brother. About everything. Honestly, Loki was actually displaying a huge amount of patience. Yet every time he had had enough and snapped at his fellow god he received this really hurt expression. Which at that point made him only more annoyed. 

"Just leave me alone, Thor", the Trickster growled. 

"But you need to eat more!"

"No, I don't. In fact I shouldn't eat more."

"Why do have to be so stubborn? Just eat!"

Glaring at his brother the god of mischief stood and walked out of the kitchen, likely returning to his room. Rest was good after all. Thor sighed, looking forlorn.

"You know, Thunder pants, maybe you should listen to baby brother?" Tony said. "Instead of insisting you know best?"

"He is so thin, Stark. That can't be good for him or the baby."

"Him having a baby isn't good for him, not that he listens... but he is actually right you know. Eating more would be bad for him."

"Why is that?" Geez, the Thunderer had look of consternation. 

"Because this magical infection of his wrecks his digestive system. Some days he barely managed to drink because of it. Trying to force it is quite dangerous. Bruce gives him supplements through IV to make up for it." Draining his coffee the engineer stood. "I know you love your brother but you need to back of a bit. He is not a little kid."

"But he is young Stark. He only became of age a decade ago. I don't want him to be reckless."

"Pot calling kettle back... anyway, think about it. I'm off to the workshop. Nat needs and update of her batons and Barton needs better arrows."

* * *

 

The coughing fit wrecked the thin frame more than ever. Vitals were horrible. Bruce looked at the god. He had starting to show, probably due to being so thin, and the strain on his body was becoming worse. Despite this Loki refused to end the pregnancy. By now the scientist was convinced it could prove fatal. The coughing worsened, grew wet. Not a pretty sound. Adjusting the IV the doctor left his reluctant patient to rest. Instead going to look for someone else. As he hoped, Clint was working the archery range, testing his new bows.

"Barton?" he called. The archer lowered his weapon, eyeing him warily. "Could we talk for a moment?" Sighing the Hawk put away his equipment and sat down on the bench.

"Is this about Loki? It is isn't it."

"Sorry... but it does concern you as well", Bruce joined him on the bench. "This pregnancy... it's killing him, Barton. At this rate he won't survive long enough for the baby to become viable."

"I know..."

"You should talk to him, convince him to end it."

"I have talked to him and... I can't. Banner... Bruce... this is not just a magical mishap. It's our kid. No matter how impossible that should be. Saying I want him to end the pregnancy is me saying I don't want our kid."

"At this rate neither will live. You risk losing both."

Shooting to his feet the archer covered his eyes and paces in front of the bench. "Gah! What do you want from me, Bruce? Making me choose? Make me make him choose?"

"Clint..."

"I don't want to lose him but if I make him choose I will either way. He wouldn't forgive me, I wouldn't forgive myself. Already I've hurt him. Once was enough."

"You would rather see him dead?"

Barton growled at him and then stalked off, the movements stiff. A short moment later Steve sat down beside the scientist. For a man his size he was surprisingly quiet when he moved.

"You okay?" the soldier asked. 

"I won't Hulk out if that's what you are worried about."

"I meant more in general. Can't be easy watching someone die when you know how to help them."

Bruce sighed deeply. "Do I? There has to be a reason why Loki is so attached to this baby that he rather risk his life than end the pregnancy."

"Or it could be simple, he is feeling protective of the life growing inside him. You know, before the serum I would probably have died before turning thirty. My health issues were numerous. As a child I nearly died multiple times. Bucky used to sit with me when he could. That was one of the reasons he didn't get angry with me when he discovered I had participated in an experiment. He did get angry at me trying to join the army."

"Which you did."

"In the end, yeah. That's how I ended up here. You know, Loki is worried about his chances of surviving at all. Child or no child. The dark energy keeps eating away at him. It has somehow attached itself, making it impossible to get out. Maybe he simply want to attempt leaving one thing behind. And that thing could be this baby."

* * *

 

When he marched away from the field he had no destination in mind but his feet took him to Loki anyway. By now the god had been detached from the IV and was back in his room. They still shared a bed sometimes but with the cough growing worse the Trickster himself choose to sleep alone lest he wakes Clint to often. At the moment he was awake and his eyes brightened when the archer entered the room.

"My Little Hawk", he purred. "Will you join me?"

"Sure." Barton climbed into the bed and snuggled up to the god. "Feeling okay?"

"As well as I can be, currently", Loki admitted. "I tire easily and feel feverish often."

"Banner thinks you are dying..."

"Are we not all? Ease my Hawk, I jest. I know. But I fear that my health will not get better regardless. At least this way I have something. And so will you."

"I don't want you dead..." Clint cradled him closer, kissing his lover's brow. 

"I dont want to die. Not anymore. I never imagined I could be surrounded by people who can appreciate me and even love me. My whole life I've been the extra. The spare. Until I wasn't even that. All of you had more than enough reason to hate me. Instead you have showed me more kindness and compassion than my own people, my own family, ever did."

It was sad, hearing how lonely the god had been. Unable to say anything Clint simply stayed close, praying he wouldn't lose this amazing man.

* * *

 

He knew he was growing weaker, that his body was failing him. Everyday waking, moving and even breathing was becoming more painful. The life within him flickered constantly, barely holding on. Loki feared that neither of them stood much of a chance. Sitting on a sofa in the shared living room he was trying to read but he couldn't concentrate. The rest were sitting nearby. They rarely let him out of their sights nowadays. Clint doing it was fine, Bruce was a bit annoying but not obvious. Thor on the other hand made him crazy with his constant hovering. Like right now when he was pestering Loki about drinking a glass of water. He was also the reason for the lack of concentration. 

"But you will get dehydrated", his brother tried. "That isn't good for you." The god of mischief just glared at him and made a demonstrative gesture to his book. To his fury the oaf snatched the book from his hand, ripping it in the process.

"Look what you did!" Shooting to his feet the Trickster roared. "Why can't you ever leave me alone, Thor? Everytime you start pestering me you destroy something or hurt someone. Usually me, on both accounts."

"It is just a glass of water, brother..."

"And I told you I don't want it. What do you do? You take my book, ripping it, and still refuse to listen to me. I swear, you are the worst! Asgard will weep to have you as king, you inconsiderate, insolent oaf!" So maybe he took things a bit far but Thor had had it coming for a while now. Rage grew on the Thunderer's face and he yanked Loki forward by the neck of his shirt.

"Whoa! Whoa! Hold it you two", Stark said waving his hands. "Thor, no violence please. Loki, no matter how justified please keep the barbed words to a minimum." Of course the god of thunder did not listen. When did he ever? He jostled the god of mischief, lifting him on tiptoe. Even raising his arm, ready for a punch.

"Take it back!" he growled. "Loki, take back what you said or I will..."

"What Thor? Hit a sick man? Hitting a pregnant person? Your pride is as always so easily wounded and your reaction is still one of violence. I won't take it back because it is true. At this rate you will become a tyrant. A man that can raise his hand against someone he claims as family have no qualms about doing so to a stranger."

"Shut up Loki! You will take it back."

"No. I won't. I have backed away from you for a millennia. Trying to measure up to you brought me nothing but pain and despair. Your Avengers have shown me more kindness than you yourself ever have."

"Thor, please let go of him", Clint were begging. That was wrong. His Little Hawk shouldn't beg.

"Thor, I will be very angry with you if you don't stop this", Banner warned. The Thunderer wavered but before he could do anything a coughing fit started wrecking Loki's body. Startled his brother let go of him, the coughing didn't stop. He felt something climbing his throat. Doubling over he coughed and then heaved. Red, crimson, liquid poured from his mouth. Another heave, more red liquid. More blood. His stomach was searing with pain so intense he thought a hole had been torn through his body. Knees buckled and only Clint's quick reflexes allowed him to meet the floor gently.

"Loki? Babe? What's happening?" The choked, panicked voice made the god want to weep. He lifted a shaking hand to touch the blonde's cheek, leaving a trail of red. Where was he bleeding from? The world around him grew hazy. "Loki? Nononono, please, no. Don't do this babe, don't do this. Please. Please. I love you. I love you. Please..." The archer probably continued his begging but Loki couldn't hear any more of it.


	12. Go back to start

Brothers were brothers. Even though they had been screaming at each other just moments ago Thor still paled when Loki collapsed and lost consciousness. Bruce rushed forward, the Trickster was losing blood but it didn't seem to come from anywhere. No wounds and it didn't come from any orifice either. It was like it seeped from his skin through the pores. Barton was beside himself, crying heavily and hugging his lover close while begging him to wake up.

"The baby...", the Thunderer said. "I can no longer feel its life force." Banner closed his eyes for a second, he had feared this would happen.

"Take him down to the medbay, I need to do an ultrasound." 

Steve walked over with a blanket that they wrapped the black-haired god in before carrying him away. Making a disgruntled face Thor followed with the rest. This was not the time to argue about small matters. In the medbay a nurse had already prepared the ultrasound and it didn't take long for Bruce to confirm his fears.

"Damn it", he swore.

"What is it?" Thor demanded. "What does this machine tell you about my brother?"

"The uterus is gone, his magic must have managed to make it go away. But the baby is still in there. In his abdominal cavity and it is dead."

"Can you remove it?" Steve asked. "Or any doctor?"

"I don't think that's possible. Just look at the blood he is loosing. His body has been strained too far. Opening him up would be the last straw."

"But if you leave it in him he will still die", Tony protested. "Isn't there anything that can be done?"

"I will take my brother back to Asgard", Thor announced. "Our healers may be able to save his life."

"Isn't there like an epidemic on going up there", the engineer said sounding sceptic.

"It was when I left but it might be under control. Even if it isn't, Loki staying here on Midgard won't help him at all and he will die. On Asgard he might have a chance."

"Take him..." they all looked at Barton who had collapsed in a chair. He looked horrible, grief and stress carving lines in his face, making his skin grey. "If there is even one chance that he may survive..."

Without further ado Thor picked up his brother and ran for the nearest exit. Not long after they heard the thunderous crash of the Bifrost. 

"Clint?" Natasha asked carefully. The archer looked at her, still crying. His eyes were unfocused. "Oh Clint. I'm sorry. I know he means a lot to you."

"I love him, Nat. I never thought I could but I do. And now..."

"He is bot dead yet, Thor might be able to save him." Shaking his head Barton took a deep breath. 

"You don't understand. This sickness, this curse, has been killing him all along. He realised that. That's why he wanted to try keep the pregnancy, to have a legacy. He never expected to survive for much longer. The baby only made everything happen faster. I will never see him again."

Bruce walked out. Loki had been many things since they first met him but at the very end he had been a friend. He would actually miss the god. And he feared Clint was right. There were no coming back from this. Not anymore. 

* * *

 

As he opened his eyes he felt honest surprise at doing so. Then he realised he was not in the medbay at the compound. Slowly he sat up, just taking in everything. Asgard, he was back on Asgard and for now, still alive.

"Your Highness?" Eir popped up in front of him, wearing her usual displeasure. "How are you feeling?"

"I don't know if I can answer that. What happened to the miasma?"

"As it happened, you helped us clear it."

"Me? I was on Midgard."

"One of my assistants remember you writing a paper about how to combat mass outbreaks a few centuries ago. We followed your suggestions and started purifying the water supply while also crushing healing stones in them once a day. The miasma cleared not long after that."

"You did this after sending Thor to Earth", he remembered that paper. It was something he had written after observing an outbreak of sun pox on Alfheim due to a magical mishap. That it had taken them that long to look at it was not surprising. "I have several books on the subject of clearing general miasma..."

"We didn't feel comfortable searching your rooms. Try to rest more my Prince. You have survived quite the ordeal."

Lying back Loki found he couldn't sleep. He had survived, yes, but the dark energy still clawed at him. They had removed his dead baby and attempted to protect his abdomen from further harm without truly understanding what was going on. He delved into himself and could already see the dark tendrils attacking his innards once more. The magic had attached itself to his golden thread, almost fusing with it. By now the only way he could possibly survive was to have the thread removed, becoming mortal.

At that he started thinking about Clint. His warm and amazing mortal. What if he could live, age and die alongside that man? Live with the Avengers and fight at their side. Not as a god but as one of them. He thought about it and felt almost like crying of longing. Removing a golden thread was almost impossible. Only someone wielding enormous power could do so. Someone like... he stopped. On Earth there were no such person. They could with some luck kill him, maybe. But here, on the Realm Eternal, there were someone with that ability. Who had, although temporary, taken away the golden thread. Even attaching it for a while to an object. The question was how to make him agree.

* * *

 

Returning to his chambers he had not expected to see his wife sitting by her loom, crying. Frigga kept sobbing even as she weaved her threads. Her smiles had slowly faded during the last year or so but she had not cried since the Curse.

"Frigga?" Odin asked carefully. "What is the matter?"

"Our son", she whispered. "Loki."

"He survived his unnatural condition as is getting better according to Eir. And with the miasma gone, he can stay with us. We can be a family."

"The miasma in Asgard is gone, not the miasma in our son. He is still not well. This is but temporary. Also, I fear he do not wish to remain here."

"Where would he want to go?"

"I'm not certain, however, it seems the mortals treated him well while he was in their care."

"Nonsense. It was they who caused him to grow a parasite in his body, making him attached to it."

Frigga studied him silently, her blue eyes unreadable. "Can you promise me one thing?"

"Depends."

"If Loki request something of you, grant it to him."

* * *

 

Even Thor could see the sickness returning. He had a worried expression and was subdued. Helping Loki holding his hair back as he heaved, expelling most of the meal the healers had forced on him.

"Brother..." he said sadly. No longer did he insist that the Trickster should eat or drink more. All it did was wrecking his body, making things worse. He coughed as the heaving subsided. "You are not getting better..."

"No... there is nothing Eir can do to help me."

"Loki, I'm sorry for how I acted on Midgard. I only wanted to help."

"That's your problem, Thor. You are always sorry but never understand what you did wrong. Not until it becomes obvious. By then it is almost always to late."

A knock came on the door, the Thunderer stood and went to answer it. A moment later he returned. "The warriors Three wish to spar with me..."

"Go."

"But..."

"Go be with your friends, Thor." He didn't want his brother present for this. Slowly nodding the blonde god left. Likely to punch some of his frustrations away. Before Loki would have enjoyed the thought of the three idiots getting pounded. Now he had more important things to to do.

As he had hoped the halls were mostly empty this time of the day. Some servants and some guards. He wondered if any of them blamed him for the prolonged sickness that had infected the Realm. No matter. The throne room were almost completely empty save Odin and a few of his advisors. Seeing the place sent shivers through the black-haired god. Last time he was here he experienced complete humiliation and suffered great pain. Being there reminded him of lying naked, paralysed, on the bare stone while that creature pawed at him. Intimate areas explored by uncaring fingers.

"Loki", he jumped slightly when Odin called to him. The advisors were leaving, several of them giving him dirty looks. "Did you wish to speak with me?" The god of mischief walked up to the throne and knelt. A supplicant to his king.

"I have something to ask of you."

"Then ask."

"I want you to remove my golden thread and give me the lifetime of a human."

"Absolutely not. You are a prince of Asgard, my son, and your duties are to the Realm." Loki didn't bother to explain to his father that he was already dying. He doubted the man would listen.

"If you ever truly loved me as your son, I ask you to grant this request of mine. Make me mortal and let me live out my days among the humans." As if on cue a coughing fit sized him, he didn't even look at the blood on his hand. It was nothing new. Odin on the other hand stared. Then he closed his eyes, seemingly in pain.

"Very well. Pack your things. In the morning I will meet you at the Bifrost and send you as a mortal to Midgard. Make sure you tell your mother. I will take care of Thor."

"Thank you, Father."


	13. Another chance

The bow lay in the grass. Broken. It was the fifth one. They were not bad by any means, he just overused them till they gave up. Tony was frantically trying to make one that could stand the pressure but Clint wanted to tell him not to bother. Being an Avenger felt redundant. Unnecessary. Wrong. Everything was wrong. The world seemed less in every way. Less colours. Less funny. Less interesting. He had trouble sleeping, reaching out for someone who wasn't there. The worst part was not knowing. Was Loki still alive? Had he died? Did Asgard's heal him and he still died? There were no news. No words.

He flopped down on his back. A few years ago he would have been ecstatic that the god was gone. In fact, that what he had hoped. Then he came back. Was different. Better. Warmer. Someone who were open to those who let him in. And he missed him. It was like someone had torn a piece of him away and he couldn't stop the bleeding. 

"I wish I could see you, Loki..." he said to the air.

"Clint", the aforementioned frowned. He knew that voice.

"Great. Now I'm hearing voices. My mind is really messed up then."

"Is that so? Better take a look at it then."

....

He was on his feet faster than should be humanly possible and stared. There, looking tired and a bit dishelved, stood Loki. The same green eyes, the same black hair. A soft smile on his lips. "Clint." The archer pulled the god into his arm, already crying.

"Are you here to say goodbye? That this is it? God I don't think I can handle this. I don't want to let you go. Know what, I don't care. You should just marry me and stay here even if we are talking weeks or days."

"I'm not here to say farewell. I'm here to stay", the Trickster held him soothingly. "Clint, I'm here to stay. I'm no longer dying."

Backing away half a step Barton met those beautiful orbs. Hesitantly he touched a pale cheek. "Really? You will be fine? How?"

"Yes, I will be fine. I had what made me sick removed by my father. By Odin."

"What? What did he take?"

"My godhood. I'm mortal and I will be able to live and die by your side", Loki smiled mischievously. "Does the marriage proposal still stands?"

Mouth agape the Hawk could only stare at him. Then he clasped the other with his hands and started kissing him roughly. "You are a bastard. Such a bastard and I love you. I love you so much", he said between kisses. "I freaking kill you if you don't marry me!"

The black-haired man only kissed him back just as fervently. 

* * *

 

They celebrated Loki's return with a huge party, smashing three things into one celebration. His return, his recovery from his sickness and the engagement between him and Barton. All the Avengers had given the former god a hug. There had been tears. Many, many tears. For all of this his Hawk had not let him out of his sight. He didn't insist on holding the black-haired man but if Loki was gone for longer than a few minutes he almost started panicking. 

"Pity you don't have your magic, you could give him an inner radar pointing to you", Tony remarked after this had happened a few times.

"I  _do_ have my magic, Stark. No such spell exist."

"Wait! You still have your magic? I thought All-Daddy made you mortal."

"My Seidr is inborn", Loki chuckled at the engineer. "It can't be removed from me anymore than your heart can be removed from  you."

"Not without dying."

"Exactly. I can't handle as much at the same time as I used to but it is still far more than most. Certainly more than those who use structure based magic."

"I'm glad you are back Lokes. Things has not been the same without you."

"I'm glad to be back. So, have you asked Pepper yet?"

"Asked her what?"

"To marry you of course. Don't tell me you are still delaying?"

"Noooo... I just not find the right moment yet."

"Sure. Lady Pepper, good to see you."

"Good to see you to Loki. This is the happiest I've seen them in a long time." Pepper was her usual calm and lovely self.

"Tony has something he needs to ask you. Don't let him escape until he do."

Leaving the flabbergast man and the curious woman Loki walked over to his fiance. It felt good, being able to think that way. Combing his fingers through the short blonde hair he kissed Clint softly. The archer immediately hugged him, as if reminding himself that this, this was real.

"I'm not going anywhere my Little Hawk. I'm all yours."

"You think I let you go anywhere, you bastard?"

The former god smiled, letting his feelings be visible. "I don't want you to let me go. You more than anyone has given my life meaning. Given me hope for a future. Without you, I wouldn't have been able to make it. I love you, Clint. I truly do."

They kissed again. Softly, gently. One of many kisses but just as sweet anyway. Around them the party was in full swing. Cheering for Tony who finally popped the question. Laughter at jokes. Stories from their lives. But for the archer and the former god of mischief none of that mattered. They were together and would be so for a long time to come. 

There might not be any happy endings in real life but they figured happiness for as long as it lasts is good enough.

 

**The end**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, another story has come to an end. To short? Well, it felt enough. No point in dragging it out. My next story will be called "In silence with you".
> 
> A huge shoutout to Shingun who by now has read my work for everyday for around three months and always leaves a comment. A few lines or longer reactions. Always warms my heart and let me feel that my work is worth it. Big thank you.
> 
> There will be an extra after this chapter. This extra will feature a short example from my original work and won't have bearing on the rest of my work. Thank you all for reading.


	14. Extra: The Legendary

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In a world completely different from our own the universe is moving towards great changes. In the midst of these changes stands the Four. The ones from legend and prophecy, the ones of fate. But beneath, there are still living, breathing people and fate can't determine everything. 

_**The one with no fate** _

For a house in the middle of nowhere it was fairly large and comfortable. Of course he had been there before but it never ceased to amaze him. It was quiet with no roads or neighbours around. For someone who usually worked and live at a large organisation it was a pleasant change. The owner of the house was sitting on the other sofa, sorting through old manuscripts. She was not a person you imagined as a scholar but then, you couldn't imagine anything of what she was unless you had seen it.

At first glance she was fairly plain. Brown hair, tall. Not thin, not thick. Her face was nothing extraordinary, neither a beauty nor deformed. Then you saw her eyes and there were nothing plain about those. They were a bright violet colour and when she looked at you it felt like she saw right through you. Every mask, everything you thought you had hidden away. It shouldn't be weird being around someone who made you feel completely seen. Who made you their focus when talking to you. But it did.

Then again, San-Nyora was by no means ordinary. For one thing she looked to be in her mid-twenties but apparently she had lived at least dubble that time. She didn't age and went through time sideways. Of course that wasn't even the most special thing about her. San-Nyora was a Warder. One of the almost myth like people that for a thousand years had protected Earth and its inhabitants. Now, she was the last. Every now and then she would leave for a while, take care of a threat and then return. She was powerful and could draw energy from the Earth itself. Once you stepped foot on her domain, you were subject to the rules she upheld.

As a human those rules didn't apply to Emir in the same way. It was very much a coincidence he had stumbled upon these people and now he had somehow become a part of their lives. Sure he was a captain in an intergalactic space organisation and had travelled to many planets. But nothing had quite prepared him for this. Being from the Southlands he was dark-skinned, like a dark bronze, his hair was black and gathered in a low ponytail. His eyes were a dark brown. Despite humans being the native inhabitants of Earth they were minority. Most people were Earthlings but not human. They were descended from people who wanted to be more than humans but instead became something else. Being human, truly human, gave you a connection to Earth.

"You are deep in thought", the light baritone of San-Nyora roused him from his contemplations.

"I guess. Just pondered how I ended up here", Emir replied, rolling his shoulder. Her violet eyes focused on him and she had that wide, knowing smile of hers. "How do I know it is a coincidence?"

"You are not connected to fate."

"Geez, thanks."

"That's not a bad thing, Emir. Quite the opposite. You have the power to change and make changes. Already you have brought change to those who need it simply by being yourself. When you are connected to fate, you move more or less according to the need of the universe. That sometimes restrict what you can do."

"Like you can't leave Earth?"

"Very much like that, yes. But think about this. There is always more people who are not connected to fate than there are who have the connection. Nothing is set in stone. You can always do more than you think."

"If you say so", Emir huffed. Talking with San-Nyora often made him feel slightly dizzy. The way her mind worked and the way she talked forced you to see things in a different way than before. And so far she had never been wrong. 

"What are you working on?" Sin-Irana joined them and looked at one of the documents. "Children's stories? Why would you work on those?" If San-Nyora was deceptively plain, Sin-Irana was the complete opposite. Tall, brown hair in a lighter shade with sharp blue eyes, she was beautiful. Her face lacked any blemish, no scars, no wrinkles. A perfect symmetry. But she didn't have the kind of beauty that people found attractive. It was colder. More like marble statue. You could admire her looks but they didn't stir any desires. She and Emir was colleagues, something he had not expected. Oh, he had heard of her. Who hadn't on ISR. Two hundred years ago she was part of those who founded the organisation. A century later she laid the foundation for what would become the Intergalactic Federation, an alliance between the different peace organisations in the known universe. Then there were all her other accomplishments. Some of which he had not believed until he met her.

Like San-Nyora Sin-Irana looked fairly young, seemingly in her twenties, despite the fact that she had lived for over two hundred years. Unlike her friend who didn't age at all she simply aged slowly. Very, very slowly. 

Together the two of them were guiding the universe as it was reaching a point when everything that had pushed it from its original course would be corrected. To do this they gathered information and became friends with the rest who were connected to fate. San-Nyora had explained that they were part of the Four. The Legendary. Four people who stood out and on the edge of society. The Last, The First, The Strong and The Leader. All of them fitted all titles and all of them had one that was more prominent than the others. He had met the other two. A young human girl from the Middle Empire and a young male Sanshushi, a warrior people that was nearly wiped out. Only two handfuls remained and their home planet were gone.

Emir looked out the window. If he had learnt something from being around these people it was to enjoy the peace while it lasted because it never lasted long enough.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fun fact time. I first created San-Nyora when I was twelve years old. She has gone through some major changes since then but a lot has remained the same. Sin-Irana was also created early on and while she has remained pretty much the same she and San-Nyora has grown with me. San-Nyora was actually green eyed initially. Then one day she suddenly had violet eyes and it didn't go away. So violet eyes it is.
> 
> The Legendary is actually inspired by the Japanese manga Dragonball and started out as a kind of roleplay between me and a friend. In time I choose to move my characters to a world of my own. I've told their story to myself many times over the years. Some characters has disappeared and some have appeared. Emir featured here is a fairly new addition to the cast. My lore for this creation is extensive and becomes more complex all the time. The day I truly write down the story it will probably span many books with additional books to explore the lore. Ah well.


End file.
